How do you discipline your child?

Kayla - posted on 12/12/2011 ( 3 moms have responded )




My son is 2 which is a horrible age in my opinon. He doesnt listen to me at all. It makes me feel like I am bad mom when I say I really hate this age. He sits in time outs for 5 minutes, but that doesnt seem to do anything. I dont know how alse to discipline him. Any suggestons?


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User - posted on 12/12/2011




I have 5 year old twins, boy and girl. Never did the time-out thing... not because my children are so good, it's because I don't like it.
My son is so far a good kid - except tandrums when he doesn't like the word NO. But I threaten to take his favorite toy away and this is helpful.
My Daughter is another chapter, she is a handful. Very winy, always want to be the center of attention. So with her I just let her cry, if she is doing it to get my attention. I explained to her (and still do) as soon as she behaves, she get my full attention or I will do something with her, crafting, drawing, playground.
That is another thing. when my children not behave, when there not "nice" I am not going to the playground. This one they understood very early ;-)
And I also invented rules, as older they got as higher leveled the rules. Like my sons 1st rule is never hit girls or woman. It helps when they fight with each other.
I also enlisted them very early in Karate. 2 hours a week, it was soooo good. They teach the little ones respect, attitude and behavior.
And please don't feel like a bad mother, because he doesn't listen. You have no idea what I went through and still going through. Those kids have never ending phases, it's not getting better, it's getting worse, but we are mothers, we love them no matter what. but we have to be careful that we love and raise them in the right direction.
When the twins where younger, like your boy, I also slapped there little hands when they tried to touch dangerous things, like the stove fire, glass or else. I rather have the screaming and not like me for a second then bringing them in the hospital.

Sharon - posted on 12/12/2011




Our eldest is 25mths and we are lucky that he is quite a well behaved boy, so far, and generally listens. I do find that he gets really frustrated if he can't burn off his energy. I have to make sure he gets outside in the morning and afternoon, for atleast 1-1.5hrs each time. If we are heading to the shops or something then I can usually get away with about 45mins as he gets the mental stimulation while we're shopping. If it's a rainy day then around 3pm he gets a bit fidgety and wants to get into everything.
If needed I threaten to take away his favourite toy, or whatever he is playing with. This usually snaps him into line, and I haven't had to take away a toy yet, but he gets one warning, and that's it, the toy will go away if needed. If he throws a toy at someone or hits someone then it's into timeout. He gets 2mins, and if he doesn't say sorry then it's another 2mins, then he has another opportunity to say sorry, if he doesn't then it continues until he does. Our timeout is in an obvious place and he gets to still see what is going on and what he's missing out on. He hates to be ignored by me and I don't utter a word or look in his direction when he's in timeout. I also don't get mad at him or anything like that. It's not something I planned, it's just the way happened. If he's doing something I don't like, such as running his car toys around the wall, I just tell him - no baby, we don't do that sort of thing here. It seems to work for him. And I praise him like crazy whenever he does good things, or shares his toys etc. He has a personality that likes to please others and he loves to get a round of applause, and he knows now that it only happens if he's behaving.
That's what works in our house anyway. Good luck. I love this age (provided he's behaving). :-)

Erin - posted on 12/12/2011




First off, 5 minutes is really too long for his age. Time outs work best when they are in time out for 1 minute per year of age. That means your son should only be in time out for 2 minutes. Now fo rme, I first set the rules before introducing time outs. We have three rules: be nice, be polite, and listen. Then, because I wanted to be able to discipline out in public as well, time outs are done facing a corner. It's boring and that's part of the punishment. By using a corner for time out, I could also put them into time out anywhere without having to take an extra item along. And yes, I have done time outs in Walmart. When you first start consistent discipline (and consistent is imperative!), you'll be doing lots of time outs. He'll learn the boundaries and not be constantly pushing them. Another thing I did was for tantrums at home. Tantrums at home brought out the "go to your room alone until you've calmed down." I didn't care if either of my boys played if it calmed them down. Being sent away from view not only stopped the tantrums (they didn't get attention from negative behavior) it also saved my sanity because I didn't have to suffer through them since I wasn't going to give in. My only break from non-physical discipline is in times of physical harm or when getting time out after bed would be giving them what they wanted (not to go to bed). In these cases, I give a hand swat to the rear end. For those that might get upset about me spanking a child in public, let me say this. I'd much rather spank one of my boys for running away from me in a parking lot than I would have to watch them get loaded into an ambulance because a car hit them. A spanking is a lot less harmful than a car. For me, good discipline is not just one technique but a well thought out plan involving a technique for each situation.

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