How should I discipline my kindergartener for visiting the principal's office? Twice?

Michelle - posted on 11/14/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )




My 5 year old son is in his first semester of kindergarten. He is having problems keeping his hands to himself (which causes the teacher to "move his bus" almost every single day) and paying attention. I've been in constant communication with his teacher and volunteer in the classroom each week. I feel that even though my son's behavior hasn't changed, I've gained a strong rapport with the teacher and have good communication.

However, yesterday my son got sent to the principal's office from the bus driver. I wasn't made aware of this until I went to put him on the bus this morning and she had him get back off. Then, she told me about his behavior. I scolded him quickly (still trying to take it all in and avoiding too much in front of classmates and siblings) put him on the bus and told her I'd talk to her when she dropped him off.

Since then, I've been emailing the principal and he informed me Jack was back in his office this morning. He did sort of downplay my son's behavior problem (possibly not knowing how distracted he is on a daily basis) but I am truly concerned.

A little bit of background: In March 2011, my son was diagnosed with epilepsy and is taking Trileptal & Lamictal. In May 2011, his dad and I got divorced. We both moved that summer. Both is father and I entered a new relationship that led to future step-mom moving in with dad and (due to my stubbornness on not moving again) my fiance & his 3 kids moved in with us. Now, dad and stepmom are living with grandma while they build their house. We have 50/50 custody arrangements. I stay at home now so I provide any before/after school care for all 4 kids, regardless of who's week it is. However, my ex doesn't have my son here much during his week.

Please don't post about all the transitions my son has been through in a derogative way. Trust me, I have beat myself up over it enough.

I'm only looking for advice on ways to address his behavior at school. I'm open to suggestions.


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Michelle - posted on 11/14/2012




Holly, thanks for the response. We actually did sticker charts for all 4 kids throughout the summer and then ended up stopping them in October. I thought they may have been part of the problem. He wasn't getting as many stickers as the others (even if I found other ways for him to earn them) so he would just say "Oh well, maybe tomorrow." and then go about his day. We even had a rewards store where you could cash your stickers in for things (a lot of which you listed below) and if they went an entire month (which meant they got their chart full) they got $10 to spend however they'd like.

And while I say I try not to discipline in front of the others, I also don't always have that option. When at home in our normal routine, it's easier. I was just completely bombarded with news from the bus driver and I didn't really know how to react.

Thanks again for the reply!

Holly - posted on 11/14/2012




it sounds as if you are doing your part on staying in touch with the teachers and the principal and the bus driver... but you may need a different approach on the discipline... i agree to keep it just between you two, as much as you can not in front of siblings or peers. but perhaps you need a sticker chart at home to document good days and bad days, that way you can see if perhaps he is having a rough morning on those particular mornings, and then if he is good for a week, you give him a treat, such as maybe a picnic in the park, or take him to the movies, or even give him a bonus on his allowance.

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