How to approach your spouse about your ADHD child?

Heather - posted on 09/05/2012 ( 3 moms have responded )




My 8y/o son has every sign and symptom of inattentive ADHD. I have been told by his 1st and 2nd grade teachers that he is showing all the classic symptoms. My problem is my husband refuses to have him tested. While I agree with him that medicating him is not the way we want to raise our child, I am hoping some sort of individualized education plan, or behavior modification may be the best course of action. I cannot get any help for my child without his consent. How do I approach this, or even go behind his back and show him that a licensed professional believes this too


View replies by

User - posted on 09/06/2012




I think you might have misunderstood. I don't want him medicated either, but he is not eligible for any assistance without a diagnosis. I can't convince dad to even have him tested

Sophia - posted on 09/06/2012




I am sorry mom --- I know you want your husband to agree with you ( but ) sometimes mom knows best. Being tested dont mean medicating --- it's knowing how to help your child do better not only in school -- but in life.

Amanda - posted on 09/05/2012




I went through a similar thing with my 4 yr old. I had doctors appointment after doctors appointment before I was referred on to a specialist.

My husband and my in laws (I have no family of my own where I live) refused to listen to me, told me it was me that wasn't coping and that I needed therapy and counselling to learn to deal with him and undo all the bad parenting mistakes I had made and caused my son to behave in the way he does.

I went ahead and scheduled my appointment anyway. They refused to talk to me for weeks. After I had my appointment and been backed up by someone who deals with kids with behavioural disorders they apologised. They still don't back me up 100% with him but I have a little bit more support than I did before.

Are you able to arrange a meeting with yourselves and the school to discuss your sons behaviour and maybe they can convince your husband that your son needs help???

I know my husband refused to listen to me, but once the behavioural specialist explained to him that there was a problem and my concerns were valid, gave us treatment options and put an action plan in place he came around.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms