husband buys 12 year old stepson Xbox games if he be good to stepmom

[deleted account] ( 4 moms have responded )

married 6 months now,i love my husband,his ex-wife tell they son to be mean to me to run me off,i heard my husband tell his son to be nice to me and he'll buy him xbox games,i feel like this is not right how do i deal with this,he should not have to buy a 12 year old games every other weekend when he come to the house,i rised 3boys thats on they on now in college,my 12 year old stepson,is very mess and dont like to clean up ,my husband have to clean up every time he goes back home,he wont make him clean up,he drop food on the floor and tell me to pick it up, thats my job,how do i deal with this,i just lost a set of twins girls a week ago, im not feeling up to this i need advice


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Iridescent - posted on 03/05/2011




I can see this is a very hard time for you right now, and I'm sorry for your loss. While I don't agree that a child should need to be bribed for basic respect, I can see how it would help in the short term. Don't feel insulted. Right now, your husband knows you need some peace and this is a way that will give it to you. Next, your step son will learn to treat you better, first with a reward as the reason, but familiarity makes take it a step at a time. Right now it takes a bribe. This is probably not going to always be the case, or the intent for it to last forever. Also, when he is treating you better, you will feel better towards him and perhaps the two of you can bond at least a little. It will contribute to a positive relationship between you in the long run. So what can it hurt to try?

[deleted account]

I'm very sorry for your loss. Have you talked to your husband about this? How long have you known him and his son? Being married only 6 months means it's still fairly new for him. Sorry, I don't really have any advice though.... other than to talk to your husband about it all. Good luck!

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