I have two stubborn, disrespectful teenage daughters, HELP!

User - posted on 01/25/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )




I have six kids all together, my oldest two daughters are from my first marriage. They were adopted by my husband in 2007. While my oldest seems to be maturing quite a bit over the past year, despite rebelling in nearly every way possible, her sister who is 14 months younger than her is getting worse.

She has always been so respectful and kind, and has begun to get lazy, disrespectful and foul mouthed. While I know that the teenage years tend to bring on behaviors like this to some extent, she is out of control. I, as well as my husband have tried nearly everything possible, and nothing seems to work. She comes home from school everyday and takes up residence on the couch or in front of the computer and blatantly refused to help out. I will take the mouse from the computer and that gets her away from there, but she then commences to one of her rants and we will battle until bedtime. Most recently she was to attend a birthday party and she had to clean the bathroom and the hallway to get to go. She was given more time than I should have given her to do so, three hours!!!! She didn't do it and didn't get to go. She has done nothing at all this week. Not only do I expect all the kids to pitch in simply to learn responsibility but I cannot do it all. I am currently going back to school as well as we are getting ready to remodel our home. She even resorted to punching and biting her Dad the other day!!!

Her behavior is also bad for her younger siblings, as they say big sister didn't do her work so why should I. I just don't know what to do!!!! Teenage years are not something I was prepared for, and I certainly hope I learn something with the older two to help me survive the following four!!!


[deleted account]

sounds to me like some serious discipline is in order here. no computer, no tv, no phone, no going out, no video games or whatever she likes to do AT ALL and that's just for punching and biting her dad, which is bullshit and she's lucky she doesn't have me for a mom.

if she wants to throw tantrums like a two-year-old treat her like one. give her chores to do and the longer she takes to get them done, the longer she's grounded. start off with a month, and every week of that month she should have certain chores to be done every day of each week and every chore that is ignored and not done each day, that's another day (or week, i'm liking week) tacked on to the end of her month where she can't go out or play on the computer or do anything. if she STILL refuses to do what she's told and refuses to cooperate, get her butt to a counselor pronto and find out why she's acting this way, because to continue to be so hateful toward the parents who have taken care of you and loved you no matter what your entire life, that is not normal and should not be allowed to happen.

if i was in charge of my teenaged brother, that's how i'd discipline him. he pulls the same crap on our mom (except she's doing it by herself and is also taking care of two disabled grandparents) but when i get involved, he watches out. i don't play.

1 Comment

View replies by

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms