I'm a first time mom, i'm having a hard time with the thought of taking my daughter to daycare

Jennifer - posted on 11/29/2010 ( 7 moms have responded )




When i was pregnant i actually worked at a daycare, and had plans on returning back to work once my daughter was 6 weeks. My daughter is now almost 4 months, and even though when i return to work she'll be in the same building as me,i'm still having a very hard time with the thought of her being upset. I am planning on going back to work next week with my daughter and am very upset about it, any moms have any advice, or have experienced putting your child in daycare. I'm just hoping that we'll both be okay, mostly her!


[deleted account]

I've never been in that situation because I'm a stay at home mom. But I'm pretty good at finding the silver lining in most situations. So, try to think of how lucky you are, compared to most working moms: You're able to go back to work, and have your daughter in the same building with you. You can check on her through out the day, touch her, hold her, soothe her. I know a lot of working moms would LOVE to be able to do that. Plus, you'll get to see first hand how she is cared for by the other workers. A friend of mine used to tell me she wished she could be a fly on the wall to see how the daycare workers interacted with her daughter. You actually CAN be a fly on the wall :) Good luck Momma and just breathe. It'll be ok!

Sharon - posted on 11/29/2010




Our little man went into daycare at 11wks old, for 3 days a week (Tues, Thurs, Fri). I was devastated. When we enrolled him I cried, felt like I was passing my responsibility onto someone else. His first day I was in the grumpiest mood all day, and as soon as got in the car was in tears. I rang up twice during the day to make sure he was ok. The daycare said I could go in and see him, and hubby tried to get me to do that, but I knew it would be too hard to say bye again. I still have days that are hard and I cannot wait to get hime & snuggle with him (almost 13mths).

BUT, it has been FANTASTIC for him, and me too. We lived in our last town for only 18mths, and have just moved to the other side of the country so don't have a big network of friends here, especially with kids. By him going to daycare he has had exposure to learning so many more things than if it were just he & I at home during the day, plus he has been able to play with kids his own age. He also gets different toys & activities to do there, so when he's at home he's not bored with what he has there.

At his old daycare he never got upset, was there from 11wks until 10.5mths. At his new daycare (started there at 12mths) he cried for 3 mornings, but it was only for about 60-90seconds. Now he smiles at the carers there and happily leans over to go to them. I also have told both daycares that if he ever has trouble settling during the day, more than 20mins upset, than I want to be notified and I will go and pick him up, but this hasn't happened once. The mornings he was upset I asked them to call me if he was still crying after 10mins, but that never happened either. Once you are out of sight and they start playing they really do forget and just want to play :-)

One thing my husband likes doing when we pick him up is to peak through the window and watch him play, before he knows we are there. Maybe you could check in on your little girl during the day and make sure she is having a good time.

It was realyl hard for me to put him in there at first, and I still have tough days, but I think what he has gotten from it, and the freedom I have at work to be me again has been priceless.


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Lisa - posted on 12/01/2010




It is going to be very hard to leave your little one! I promise it gets better! Ii am a full time working mom with 2 sons. My first went to daycare at 9weeks! The second at 8 months. I work in a school and my schedule allowed me more time with the second because I had him closer to summer break. You will be able to visit. Carve out some playtime during the day so he nows your close by. But don't be surprised when he cries his eyes out when you leave - you never get use to that BUT they do stop crying in a few minutes! good luck and try not to worry my boys are heppy and healthy at 6 and 9 years old!

Karina - posted on 11/30/2010




Just breathe it's going to be okay my job gave me 6 weeks to get back to work after I had my daughter. So neat less to say I have been there. It was difficult but you should prepare yourself go out without the baby so she gets use to you going away for a little bit and coming back. That way it's not such a shocker for her or for you. But don't worry soon you will be in a routine and it will get easier. wish you luck next week.

Brooke - posted on 11/30/2010




Everyone has different situations, some need to go back to work whether it be for money or sanity, some need to stay at home... I have been lucky enough to be a stay at home mummy but also work part time.. It has been so hard but worth it. I am an aged care nurse and work 6-9am of a morning 5 days a week so my daughter isn't even awake at that time or just waking up. So I have never had to think about day care.
I have had other parents try to pressure me into it, as far as i am concerned my daughter nearly two is happy, healthy and advanced for her age. Why try to fix something that is not broken. I will maybe think about preschool in a year or two but until then there is no chance that I am going to let another person do my job.
Also to add... it is good for you knowing where your baby is and how they are being treated but in my town there are often complaints of abuse etc in our daycare centres. My sister in law did her certificate and now refuses to work in any daycare cause of what she has seen.
The children are always sick.. it is a stuffy environment with forced sleeping time for the carers to have a break. I have seen what has happened to my nieces and other children going into these places, they start as the most gorgeous children and come out brats with attitudes.
If you know where you are putting your child then that is awesome but other wise make sure you do your research :-)

Jennifer - posted on 11/30/2010




Awee thank yu everyone, yu made me feel alot better!! i get more and more nervous everyday but im hoping she isnt upset once we get there!! ill let yu know how it goes :)

Lise - posted on 11/29/2010




I'm blessed to have a year off for maternity leave (Canada), but I stressed about my first daughter going to daycare from the day she was born. I am now off with my second daughter and know once you get through the first few days it gets better as long as you trust the caregiver. It will be o.k, and like Joy said you still get to be in the same building. Good luck

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