I really need advise grown adults spresding rumors about my 13 year old daughter

Jessica - posted on 10/07/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )




I really need advise rumors started about my daughter from grown adults?

I don't even know where to begin right now or if I'm gonna be able to make any sense of all of this. I have a 13 year old daughter that is a good kid good grades and very respectful ect. I have never really been a

discipliner and always more on the soft side, but at the same time she really hasn't done anything that I know of. So anyways an old friend of mine from junior high has a daughter the same age. Me in this girl has been friends since we were 13 until the last year year she became a different person different lifestyle ect. Our daughters do not hang out with one another but have mutual friends. According to things that I have heard I guess her daughter is boy crazy,havinf intercourse,weed,alcohol,sneaking out. I dont know if this is true or not but these are rumors of her child. I never started one of them or talked about them. I am an adult and the only reason I would have said anything it would have been to her mom, but I knew she knew. So I guess this weekend her daughter was spending the night at some other girls house and when the parents spoke she asked the other mom if she had new my daughter. Then I guess she talked so bad about her calling her a hoe and all crazy stuff and that I allow her to act this way. Then I guess them two girls snuck out and was with older man had sex drank smoked weed. My daughter was home for 100% fact but now this mom said my daughter was there and everything that her daughter did she saying my daughter did. Now my daughters friends are asking her if she did this stuff and the parents are calling me telling me that they know its not true but wanted me to know what was going on. Then tonight when I was on facebook I saw my other friends facebook status this girl has been my bestfriend since elemantary school she is my daughters godmother and I'm her daughters godmother. I have raised her daughter for the last 2 years until she got a boyfriend and took her we havent talked not in 6 months her daughter is 6. Well anyways this is what she wrote on facebook tonight.

When a mom is a friend more then a mom the child will do as she/he pleases when a child parties 2 much or stays at a friends house cause u let them then sneaks out just cause the mom talks 2 the parent on phone don't mean nothing go to house and make sure ur child is gonna b watched the rite way cause kids r out there going 2 gridding party out there having sex and be careful moms theres a few moms i know who think they know everything but think again we know more then u think and u do take them and get them checked!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

clearly this is for my daughter but WHY my daughter is so upset and so arn't I what can I do say and the thing is if these stories were true for 1. They are mothers come to me. 2. I have known both of these so called adults for 20 years or more and 3. One of them is her godmother.


Bobbie - posted on 10/07/2012





First take a step back and breath. You have been caught up in their drama.


Tell your daughter that you trust her. That she can come to you and tell you what other people are saying and you will listen. You must realize however that you will never be able to control what other people say, and more importantly you can't control how others spread what you say.


DO NOT respond to anything on facebook. People as so spiteful and mean on that website. Don't fall into reading what she says and "knowing" who it is meant for. Seriously, you are sensitive to the issue and it may sound like it applies but you don't know who facebook msgs are meant for. That is a cat a mouse game you can't play. It will suck you into drama.


Tell your daughter what I am telling you.....You and you alone are responsible for your actions. If someone wants to speak about someone it is only one person's opinion. BUT if you tell others that person's opinion YOU have started a rumor.


Sounds like you didn't handle the calls from other parents well when it came to your friend's child. Don't respond to parents questions, it is none of their business or yours.


If you don't react and give it time to die down you will find that you are still friends. As long as you keep your mouth shut, After a few weeks private message them that you are sorry for any ill feelings your words have caused. Or say that you are sorry for the rumors and hope they are doing well.

This conversation has been closed to further comments

1 Comment

View replies by

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms