Im pregnant, and meeting with a girl who is pregnant by the same guy.

[deleted account] ( 3 moms have responded )

Im on #2 for our family, 20 weeks along. my boyfriend and i broke up for a week and there is another girl pregnant now. She has 4 kids already with different men, and her having this baby would ruin our family. I understand its my boyfriends problem since he did it, but im meeting with her to explain to her how this will affect my family and take from the kids we already have. He wont want anything to do with it, so if anything he will just pay child support. i dont even want that, were not rich so it would completely be taking from MY kids.... she doesnt understand he doesnt want to be with her and that what they did was a one time thing... how do i explain to her the cons of this situation, i dont want to be abitch, and frankly i feel i selfish?? what do i do?? im meeting with her friday for a women to women talk.... i really want to talk her into an aborion,,, we will even go with her and pay....


♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 11/19/2013




So, you're really going to meet with another pregnant woman and tell her that she should have an abortion because your man can't keep his pecker in his pants?

Did you REALLY think this through? What gives you the right to have a baby by the man, and demand that she get an abortion? Who says she doesn't have the same rights to be a mother as you do? Oh, wait...that would be no one, other than you.

Definitely not a good idea, my dear. An offensive one, yes, but not a good one.

Your man wants to sleep around and create multiple children with multiple women. He'd better get himself a good paying job, because he's stuck with support. Whether he "wants" anything to do with them or not, he wanted enough to do with their mothers that he had sex with them...

I'm sorry sweetie, but the brutal truth is that you can't (and really shouldn't!) tell her to have an abortion. He can ASK her to, but she doesn't have to, and I hope she doesn't! He played, and, yes, regardless of the fact that he has other kids, he gets to pay support for that kid!


View replies by

Ev - posted on 11/19/2013




Okay, first off, it will affect your family but you have no absolute say in the child support at all nor his obligation to this child he has created with this woman who has four other children already. There is no need to meet with her and explain the cons of the situation. The CON is that you are with a man who is as you say going to blow off this one woman with his kid and what makes you think he won't blow you off. You may not be rich or have a lot, but he does have to support his child. There is no way you have any say in this. You can not ask her to abort the child, not ask for support, nor tell her how bad off your family will be because of what your man did. It is between him and her but not you. He was the one that slept with this woman and he has to do what needs to be done no matter what you say.

Michelle - posted on 11/19/2013




You don't have any rights to tell her what to do with the pregnancy, especially an abortion.
You should be looking at your relationship. If you were only split up for a week and he got another woman pregnant in that time then he really doesn't think much of you. He should have though about the consequences before he had unprotected sex. Have you (and him) been tested for STI's?
I don't think you having a talk with her is going to do anything except make her do the opposite of what you want her to do.
Really it's his problem and he's the one she should be talking to her. I guess he's already shown he can't control himself though so maybe that's not a good idea either.

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