In-laws talking bad about me to my baby

Sara - posted on 02/01/2014 ( 4 moms have responded )




I'm a first time mom, my baby girl is 3-month old and she's the greatest joy of our lives. Last Sunday we visited the in-laws and my MIL was holding my baby. I swear that I heard her and FIL talking bad about me to the baby and complaining through the baby that they don't see her enough...I really heard, not only an impression.... (my husband and I visit them every Sunday, although they live almost one hour away). They were in the kitchen and I was in the dining room, the two rooms are communicating and it's easy to hear other people's converstaion. Unfortunately I wasn't able to raact, cuz I really wasn't expecting this and was hurt. My hubby (whom I love deeply) wasn't in the same room and didn't hear. When I told him he said that I misunderstood their words and it is not possible. Well, in the past, before baby was born, I heard them a few times making snarky remarks behind my back, but since there wasn't a child involved then, I didn't care too much (as long as my relation with DH was fine, I didn't care about their comments). I'm always respectful to them and they get to see the baby every Sunday, send them pics of hers and I keep them updated on her growth, etc...Now that I heard them talking bad about me to my child, I really don't feel like visiting them anymore and I feel full of anger. Not having my husband's support make things even worse. Forgive my English, I'm not a native speaker, I'm Swiss Italian.


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Jodi - posted on 02/01/2014




"We don't see enough of you" is not talking bad about you. It's a figure of speech. I'm not sure why you would take it personally.

Jenny - posted on 02/01/2014




Maybe it was a figure of speech. If not do your inlaws drive? If so tell them to come see your child more often

Andrea - posted on 02/01/2014




I say do not punish your daughter, as they are her grandparents. See how this next visit goes and if you happen to hear them talking badly about you again just very politely say I wish you wouldn't talk poorly to my daughter about me.. As I would never speak poorly to her about you.. I am just asking for the same respect in return. Also if it just them saying they don't see her enough that is something you just let roll and go.. Every grandparent says it.. My father in law {MIL passed shortly after our daughter was born and sons 2nd birthday} live 2 mins from us and we hear this all the time or the kids will say papa said we need to come visit more.. DO NOT let them know that it made you angry as that is just fuel for them to know what angers you.. Just tell them it is a respect thing.. Biggest thing is pick your battles very wisely when it comes to the IN LAWS or will cause problem with you and your husband.. Hope this is a little helpful.. Take care and best wishes...

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