
Karina - posted on 03/18/2012 ( 9 moms have responded )
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Basically I don't think I want to be with my daughters father anymore.. we have been together 5 years our daughter is almost 2 and he does everything to take care of us he works while I stay home and take care of baby and focus on school he is a great dad and wants to be with me forever but I just don't feel the same at all but I feel bad because I know it would hurt him to know how I feel and I don't want him to feel like he worked so hard to take care of us and get me through school and now I want out... What do I do I know so many women would love a man like this and I have the power to stay and give my daughter a life with mommy and daddy together but I feel I would be sacraficing my own happiness if I stay
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You need to address WHY you want out. What is missing from your relationship that you think you can get from being free of it?
Once you know that, you will be able to seek ways to fulfill that need within the relationship.
You may also want to seek professional help--it never hurts. Ask your husband to go with you. Just tell him that you are feeling unfulfilled in your relationship, and that as far as you can see, it is from no fault to him, but you need his help to be happy again. If he really loves you, he'll go with you. If not, see counselling on your own before ending the relationship.
From what you have posted here, I don't see any reason to end the relationship without giving it your best shot first. ALL relationships go through a phase of monotony--they get boring, a bit claustrophobic for a time--it is during that time that we are forced to look at what we truly want in our lives, for the rest of our lives, what made us fall in love in the first place, and make our relationship stronger. When you come out of that phase, the feeling is amazing.
Connie - posted on 03/19/2012
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my dear, love is something that you choose to do or not to do. you have to work at every day. you have to decide for yourself first why you want out...exactly. what is missing? I know this is going to sound hooky but go get the book the love dare. we are often under the belief that love just is and requires no work on our part so we never learn how to work on it...that is what the book teaches. ultimately you have to decide what is most important to you and the cost you are willing to pay to achieve it. Good luck and God bless!
Louise - posted on 03/19/2012
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Karina you have obviously been thinking this for some time. Why? If the love has gone from your relationship you either put the effort in to get it back or you call it a day. Another thing is to say to yourself if your child was not here would you stay in the relationship. If the answer is no then you need to get out. A child knows when parents are not happy and two unhappy parents can damage her. Think long and hard what you want from this.
Alicia - posted on 03/18/2012
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I agree w/ Kelly. WHY do you want out is definatly the first question that needs to be asked. My DH went through the same thing, he told me, we got help and ended up getting to the bottom line of what he was feeling. It was the best thing we could have done because our marriage is so much better now.
One main thing we did was schedule "date nights" at least once a month & that helped. It was a challenge to come up with date night idea to do cheep and at home after the kids went to bed, but in the end it gave us something to really laugh together about.
Good luck.