Is normal to feel this way about my pregnancy?

Jennifer - posted on 09/04/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )

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Before you get all upset or mouthy with me please I want some help. I'm 17 year olds and 31 weeks pregnant. I'm single and alone my pregnancy was 100% unplanned I was raped by my abusive ex boyfriend. I live at home currently I can't stop crying I hate myself I don't have feelings towards my baby anymore I want it gone. I use to be so happy about the baby and I use to get happy with ultrasounds now my feeling is gone. My parents are stressing me out making me feel selfish because of my feelings and the always yelling at me putting me down I know they are under stress because of my sister having autism she's 18 and plus their still trying to cope with what happened but their verbal abuse towards me isn't helping. I don't like the fact that I'm starting a new school just so I can graduate I just want to be alone(my other school told me to either drop out or change schools because of my pregnancy). I honestly don't got anyone to vent to, I think I'm going to lose it I just hold my feelings insides or at least try to because whenever I tell them how I feel everyone just tells me to get over it. I feel like the baby is going to ruin my life I'm going to be nothing I'm just going to be some welfare mother or some loser that has no future I can't think good choices right now, I know if I gave the baby up for adoption I'd end up going suicidal and killing myself because the baby is the only reason why I haven't committed suicide. I have really bad anxiety and depression and post traumatic stress disorder. I honestly feel like a selfish person to be thinking so twisted towards my baby. Please help

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