Mother in law problems =( Help please

[deleted account] ( 1 mom has responded )

About two weeks ago I had to leave my 11 month old son with his Grandmother (my mother in law) for a few hours while I attended a prenatal appointment. I sent him to her house with his milk, lunch and snacks for the afternoon, when I picked him up nothing I had brought had been eaten. I asked her why and she told me that he ate an EGGO WAFFLE WITH SYRUP and had some juice (I do not give him either of those things)... I was horrified, but she is not the type of person I want a confrontation with because to be honest... she scares the living daylights out of me (the last few times I have confronted her about things she has snapped at me). To add to this situation, since that day my son is being extremely picky with his food, which obviously he wasn't before and I REFUSE to feed him unhealthy foods... I am worried he is not getting the sufficient amount of nutrients from his food, because he won't eat anything unless it is sweet. The only things I can get him to eat are fruits like grapes, bananas, strawberries and small amounts of yogurt. He spits other food out as soon as we get it in his mouth, and it bothers me because he used to eat EVERYTHING. I have told my husband about this, but because he hasn't seen it first hand he doesn't believe me, he thinks it's a phase even though this "phase" coincidentally started the day after visiting his Grandmother. It seems that every time I bring up a concern with his mother he gets overly defensive as well and stands up for her always saying, "I don't imagine she gives him anything she didn't give me as a baby" as if I am making things up. I need some serious help/advise, I can't listen to MY mother because she is extremely outspoken and I don't agree with her methods of problem solving. How do I get my son back to his normal eating habits? And how do I get my husband to stand by my side and tell his mother to respect my wishes?!


♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 02/18/2014




Well, first, you need to stop freaking out so bad about one eggo waffle and some syrup. It's not going to ruin his health. Once in awhile is perfectly OK

And how you handle this phase is just the same as every other you've gone through up till now...consistency, patience, and consequences.

Every kid goes through an "I don't like that" phase. Food phases start out around this age. My son went through a phase where he didn't like meat, none at all... yes, it coincided with a visit from a friend who was vegetarian, but at the tender age of 13 months, he didn't put that together, just entered a no meat phase.

So, in order to keep family harmony, try discussing, rather than dictating. No one is going to be 100% exactly like you. Your mother most likely has things that she does that you don't like either...and you adjust for that, correct? That is a family dynamic. There are some battles that you walk away from, others you fight. YOU need to decide how much energy you waste on the fights, whether they're really worth the effort, in the grand scheme of things. Such as the eggo/syrup...Yes, you don't feed that to your son...but is he really that harmed by it? No. Did it cause him to realize that there's another level of taste sensation out there? Beyond 'sweet', i doubt it. Did it REALLY cause him to stop eating everything else you offer? No, it really didn' meal does not a dietary change make.

So, in my opinion, you really need to be a bit easier on your MIL. After all, she's not threatening your son...she's loving him. Things to get really freaked about: Not transporting your child in a car seat. Allowing your kid to play in traffic in the road.

Differences in opinion about what's ok to feed? Let there be some leeway, or you'll go nuts.

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