My 14 yr old daughter out of control

Monica - posted on 06/20/2016 ( 2 moms have responded )




I've had a rough ride with my only daughter, whom I've never thought would rebel...I'm a single mother of three two boys 22, 19 and my daughter 14... And I went wrong somewhere and I can't figure it out... I just know the i will always be there for my daughter. Even though I know I've done everything I can to possibly install great values in my daughter its just with the Internet and peer pressure it's more thAn kids can handle nowadays but that's when you as a parent have to have hands down on situations and document everything so when times come you are prepared to give account of what your rules were and everything your child did that was against your rules... They become responsible for all their actions... But you as the parent have to lay the rules down.... As a young teen that said its the parents fault I this site, so what true take everything they can't live without for example my daughter lives for Facebook. I no longer have her a phone but she happen to get her hands on one., even though my rules say she is not allowed to have one....she continues to break all rules even not coming home sometimes but all this is reported to the courts.... We have court coming up in a few days. I love my daughter and I never want to hurt her but she knows it all right now so I let her be she will sneak out the window at night because she bows I will never leave any hour of the night not while I'm alive so she stuck with being immature and sneaking out the window.... Yes terrifying but I believe in the almighty Lord Jesus Christ and he is guiding me, though it's hard.... I do my part as a parent , single mother... But I do t let they label stop me because I'm young and strong and I will continue to give it my all... I have no pity for my self.... I'm doing the best that I know... And the rest u leave it to God! My daughter has court this Thursday and I will make sure the judge knows I've put I. 100% and everything my daughter has done then will ask the judge that my 14yr old puts herself in danger when she disobeys my rules , example by not coming home and thinking she can do what she wants without asking for permission.. I really hope the judge has a great option... I will update you... I have court on Thursday....."


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Erica - posted on 06/22/2016




I’m so sorry to hear that you are having trouble with your precious daughter. No matter the circumstance she is still your daughter and most of all she belongs to God. As parents we want the best for our kids and hope and pray that all that we do will be enough to steer them in the right direction. When things don’t go as planned we think we have failed in some sort of way. I commend you on choosing to always be there for your daughter. Whether she is like the prodigal son, she will come back home…don’t give up hope and don’t stop fighting. She does not belong to the world or the pressures that may come her way each day. I’m sure you are truly concerned for her safety and want to know that she will be okay. Sometimes our parenting rules can be overwhelming and we don’t recognize that the rules and barriers only draw our children further away from us. The teen years are not easy especially with things such as the internet and peer pressure while our children are at a stage in their life where they are trying to self-identify who they are as an individual. I went through and am going through the teen years with my children so I completely understand your pain. Though we can’t control every situation I learned to make efforts to be involved in my teen lives. I didn’t approve of social media for a long time and blocked their phone from having internet and texting for quite some time, but I recently gave them texting and social media. I let them know that if they want to have access to social media and texting I would like to know who they are having contact with and shared with them the importance of making good choices when it comes to these things since there can be many dangers. If they want to go out with their friends then I need to know what is called the “Five W’s” (Who? What? When? Where? Why?). I shared with them the facts of life, the dangers, the realness that the streets have to offer as I refuse to let others teach them or show them what the world has to offer. We see live examples every day we step outside and we can choose to do something positive with our life or do something negative. The choices we make today will have an effect on our future. If you and your daughter haven’t been able to spend much time lately I would recommend trying to bring those moments between the two of you. Sometimes just spending time together will open the door to build a platform for communication. They need to know that we are there for them and support them. This does not mean that we have to condone what they are doing. When I was going through rough patches with my teen I held her even closer by praying for her out loud if she didn’t want to pray with me, had dinner and a movie at home with an inspiring movie, listened to “Focus on the Family” broadcasts, made meals together and talked about the current celebrities, food, videos, songs, etc., asked her about struggles she may be going through, goals she has for her future, etc. We have to put the anger and negative feelings aside at times if we are going to try and reach out to them and welcome them home with open arms. As we continue to raise them and don’t know if they were ever really listening, as long as we speak truth and love into them, we have a greater chance of knowing that they will heed to the negative and turn and run toward doing what’s right and best because of all of the things that were instilled in them through the years. Allow God to guide the both of you through these times and continue to give all of these things to God. Please feel free to listen to the broadcasts that “Focus on the Family” offers. You can visit their site at There’s a broadcast coming up on June 30th, called “Parenting Your Teen When Times Are Tough”…it sounds interesting. They also have an article on their site that may provide some assistance ( ). Blessings to you and your daughter. May you and her find rest in God and allow Him to carry you both through these current matters.

Jodi - posted on 06/20/2016




What does your daughter have court for?

How did she get her hands on a phone? Who is paying for it? Someone has to be paying for the credit for her to access the internet on a phone.

How is she managing to continue to sneak out at night? If that were my kids, there wouldn't be a window she could sneak out of. There wouldn't be a door she could sneak out of either. Locks. Or alarms.

Where is she going when she is staying out all night?

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