My 6 year old daughter asked me "why did you leave dad" ...

Taryn De - posted on 06/22/2015 ( 3 moms have responded )




I have been divorced for almost 6 years. This past weekend my 2 daughters spent the weekend by their Dad. When they came home this morning; my 6 year old asked me "why did you leave dad". I was completely thrown! Um... huh ... what you mean. She repeated her question. My x was present when she asked and his response was we'll talk when you are 21. My response was "we'll talk tonight". My eldest is 10 and she understands and every couple of months we "chat" about it all, but for some reason I cant seem to come up with a suitable answer for my 6 yr. old. She was just under a year when we split. I left him because he was just absent; around but not. Lived in the virtual world of games and cheated.
Anybody have any advise for me... xxx


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Raye - posted on 06/22/2015




I agree with keeping it simple. I'm not sure I would say that you didn't love each other anymore, unless you throw in that there's no way that you could fall out of love with your kids. Kids will think that you loved daddy- then you didn't, and you love your kids- so maybe someday you won't. I would just say something like you couldn't be the best mommy/daddy while you were together and sometimes marriages don't work out.

Michelle - posted on 06/22/2015




I agree with Jodi, the children don't need to know why their parents have split up, that's between you and your ex. My children just know that their Dad and my self couldn't live together and didn't love each other anymore.
They don't need to know he was (and still is) an alcoholic and would screw anything in a skirt.

Jodi - posted on 06/22/2015




All they need to know at this age is that you and daddy didn't love each other any more as husband and wife and you decided to split up. Or maybe as simple as you weren't getting along very well. After all, none of that is exactly untrue. They do NOT need to know real reasons. I'd be sorely disappointed if you have told your 10 year old that he cheated on you, because that is adult business, between yourself and your ex. My 23 year old step-daughter has still never been told the real reason for her parent's break up, because she doesn't need to hear about what a slut her mother was. Children love both parents and don't want to hear bad about either one of them. So stick with a very simple explanation.

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