My 7 year old is out of control

Amber - posted on 11/14/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )




Hi, I am a mom of 3 children and also have 3 step children that come over on weekends. Our youngest is a 7 year old girl, who is out of control. I can't figure out what to do anymore. She is having problems in school. She is smart enough for the gate program however she does what she wants when she wants. The same at home. I have grounded her, taken everything away, kept her home from fun activites even tried spanking, time-outs are a joke. Please help me I am feeling so lost!!! My Husband finally sees how she is and now is trying to help me get her under control but so far we are at a loss. I have talked to many people, professionals included, she is not ADHD like her older brother. Her teacher caller her the little politician because she manipulates anyone she can.


Ariana - posted on 11/14/2012




I would try to focus on three behaviors she has that are effecting your household the most. So if she back-talks, doesn't do ______, or hits others (don't know if she does just an example) you would work on JUST those three things for now.

What specifically is she doing? It's usually easier to work on a specific behavior and try to fix that rather then expecting to have a full change right away.

She is probably smart enough to know what's going on, you may want to try involving her (as much as possible) in any plan to change. You can ask her upfront, I see you've been doing this (refusing to do this) lately, what's up? See what she has to say and if there are any legitimate complaints you can work on fixing. Ask her what can be done about it that will work for both of you. She may come up with something that works for you and her (or not). Either way explain that you would like to solve this problem and you two need to work on this. Try to find something that takes her feelings into account so she'll feel more involved in the solution. This won't make everything better but can help towards getting her more involved.

Has she been to a councellor? Of all of you to family councelling? A family councellor may be able to help the situation.

More specifics on what she's doing exactly may be better for helping figure out what to do.

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