My boys (oh sorry, MEN) 30 and 32 years old, live together

Andrea - posted on 01/20/2016 ( 3 moms have responded )




My sons are both single and share a house. I have noticed some really hard feelings, coming from the younger of the two , towards his older brother. He is also putting some serious stress on himself about not feeling like an adult because he still lives with his brother. They SHARE THE HOUSE, it belongs to my husband and I but they pay the mortgage. It is not like one owns it and allows the other to live there.I'm very upset because I hate it when either of them are unhappy, and the younger one seems miserable. He says that his older brother treats him with no respect, leaves messes, doesn't do anything like clean the house, and talks very sarcastically to him more often than not. It's truly breaking my heart, I'm trying to figure out how to guide him, how to cope with it, and just what to do in general.


OnlyBelieve - posted on 01/21/2016




I know it breaks your heart. No matter what age they are, a mom wants to see their kids happy. Only thing you can do at this time is continuously be the supporting mother that they know they can come to when they're upset and she will provide wisdom.

You can tell him with motherly love & wisdom that he's an adult now and has the option to make his own choices. He can choose to find his own place and live independently on his own or choose to stay, it's up to him.

Blessings to you, mom!! :)


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Dove - posted on 01/20/2016




By 30 years old if he is not able to handle his adult relationship w/ his brother... it is WAY too late for you to intervene. Unless he has serious mental/emotional health issues I'm pretty sure he can figure out what he is willing to tolerate or find a way to leave.

Raye - posted on 01/20/2016




Your sons are adults, and should be able to work the problem out themselves, or the younger son might want to think about moving out. If that leaves the older brother to where he can no longer afford payments by himself, then he should get a new roommate or also find a new place to live.

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