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my daughter is 10 and wont sleep without me what do i do

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Julie - posted on 08/13/2012

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Is she doing any harm r u a single Parent am only asking because that's what i got asked i say put your foot down if she won't do it tell her she's to big to be in your bed. she's not a baby if it doesn't work treat her like a baby don't let her out without u don't let her do anything big girls at 10 should be able to do i give it a week; 0) good luck xx

Elfrieda - posted on 08/13/2012

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Is this a recent thing? Did something happen, like a divorce or death in the family?

And she won't sleep without you being home, or she insists on sleeping in your bed?

Sandy - posted on 08/13/2012

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It is very difficult sometimes to refuse to allow a child to sleep with you when they have gotten into the habit of doing this. Ideally it would have been best to discourage her from doing this at a much younger age but since she has become used to sleeping with you it might take a little time to retrain her to sleep in her own bed. If I were you I would talk with your daughter's pediatrician, I'm sure this is not an unusual problem and no doubt the doctor has encountered many other mother's who have had the same problem with their child. My guess is that the doctor will tell you that for awhile it will be difficult for your daughter to learn to sleep without you and that you will have to be patient. You might try putting her to bed before you go to bed and sit next to her and rub her back or stroke her hair to help sooth her so that she might be able to fall asleep without being in your bed. I would gently tell her while putting her to bed that though you love her very much and like to spend time with her that she is a big girl now and old enough to sleep in her own bed. I would also tell her that her friends are also sleeping in their own beds. It may take several nights of sitting next to her and comforting her while she falls asleep before she feels secure and comfortable falling asleep in her own bed but eventually she will learn to sleep alone after having some reassurance and comfort from you whild learning to do this. When she does sleep in her bed for a full night I would praise her in the morning and tell her that you are proud that she is acting so grown up. Another thing you might try if she becomes stubborn about doing this is to tell her that you will reward her for staying in her own bed by giving her a treat that she would like the next day. Be sure to follow up on the treat so that she is sure to be rewarded for good behavior. I think that the positive reinforcement is much better than any sort of punishment for not cooperating with you. I know it was always much easier to get my kids to comply if I used positive reward instead of punishment. Best of luck to you.

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