My son died a week ago yesterday in a car crash, he was 27. No one seems to understand how I feel

Theresa - posted on 11/16/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )




I dont know what to do with myself, I am so heartbroken and have so many unanswered questions. I know this will not go away, and no matter how many times people say he's in a better place I get more angry. The better place is here with me


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Theresa - posted on 11/16/2012




Thanks so much for all of your kind words. I found this site and thought it would be a good place to start. Brandon was my first born and yes he will always be my baby. It was such a tragic ad unexpected accident , I'm still in disbelief , I buried him this last Tuesday, one month after his 27th birthday. I know I have to be string for my other 2 kids, but they seem to be going on a lot faster than me. I'm not still married to his father, but I have a wonderful husband. His dad and stepmom and I are really close, sounds strange, but I seem to find comfort talking to his stepmom

FoxyMom - posted on 11/16/2012




My friends son died at 5 years old. He found comfort in talking with others that are going through a loss of a child. See if you can find a support group. Sometimes it's easier to talk to those who can relate to the same situation.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 11/16/2012




Theresa, I'm so sorry for your loss!

Your grieving process will take time, and you will need the support of your family and friends through the process.

I agree with Holly, if you are married, keep your husband close. Let him help you with your process. No, you'll never be "over" your son's death, but in time, you'll be able to keep his memory while still moving forward. Don't let anyone try to tell you that you're carrying on too long in the process, because each is different.

If you're a church goer, let your church family in. I know that their platitudes can be irritating, especially when you hear the same thing over and over, but they do mean well, and want to be there for you, even if they're a bit clumsy in the process.

Allow yourself time to break down and grieve. Also, I'd recommend grief counseling, at whatever point you feel up to it. They can help you with strategies to handle everything from the whole "in a better place" phrase to day to day interactions.

I wish you the best, my dear. I know your heart is breaking with the loss of your boy. I hope and pray that you can find your way to healing swiftly while keeping the memory of your son in your heart.

Holly - posted on 11/16/2012




i am so very sorry for your loss, nobody will ever know that pain until they experience it themselves. Not even i know how it feels. I am sure these people are trying to comfort you the best way that they know how, they just don't know the right words to express their sympathy for you.a week isn't a long enough time to grieve, i doubt there is a long enough period of time, i am sure that for the rest of your life you will be grieving. Your son, regardless of his age, was your baby, this i do know, that a mother's child is the most precious thing a mother has, and for him to be gone is heart wrenching, something that you will never be able to "get over" and be better. I don't know if you are still married to the father of your son, but the best thing to do, instead of pushing him away (if you are married) is to cling to your husband, and go to counseling together, i am sure that his father is grieving as well.

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