Needing Motherly Advice

Yvette - posted on 06/15/2014 ( 1 mom has responded )




Hello Everyone, my youngest who will be 21 in the next few days decided to give up his summer job and go stay with his girlfriend for the summer until school starts again. He is a rising senior in college and extremely bright and focused. I am deeply concerned and in pain that this summer could take him off track. The young lady is in college as well and staying on campus in a dorm suite. This concerns me because guest of dormitory visits are not longer than 3 days...therefore; I feel some untruth about this situation. When I ask questions, he gets extremely quiet and the more I ask the more defensive he gets. I want only the best for him and it hurts to feel that this summer may disrupt his focus. It hurts and I do not know what to say or do.


♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 06/15/2014




Well, he's an adult. He's probably a bit pissed that you're prying into his private life at this point.

If he's supporting himself, and staying out of trouble, I'd be happy with that, personally. At this point, you're 'borrowing trouble' by perceiving this as a huge deal that will disrupt his continued studies in the fall.

However, if he's made the determination that schooling is not doing it for him at this point in his life, you also can't change that decision, because, again, he's an adult, and (presumably) capable of making perfectly good decisions on his own.

Yes, this is tough on you, because you are used to making those decisions for him, but as I had to realize with mine...he won't grow up unless I let him, and part of that is making mistakes and learning how to recover.

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