NEW MOM! haha

Codie - posted on 12/30/2014 ( 2 moms have responded )




okay so its kind of my fault but it seems like the only way i could get my babygirl to sleep was to have her fall asleep on my chest, then we would just end up sleeping that way the whole night ! its become a bad habit for me as well as i believe it has her to but what im trying to ask is how do i break her of the habit of co sleeping with me and falling asleep without some type of movement ?? Im a new mom 19 years old,first child and im just so in love with her i dont want to hear her cry or be upset in any type of way.. but im draining myself HELP?


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Guest - posted on 12/30/2014




How old is your baby now? If she is still an infant, this isn't really a bad thing. Letting her fall asleep with you, especially skin on skin contact, actually helps strengthen her bond with you and give her emotional security. That extra security will make it easier for her when you eventually have to leave her with someone else--children whose mother's held them a lot have less issues with separation anxiety than those whose mothers held them less often (like only those who only held baby when feeding, moving around or playing, as opposed to those who frequently enjoyed snuggling up and holding the baby for a while).Of course all children are different, but it never hurts to improve your odds.

IF the baby is still young, you can let her fall asleep on you, then move her into a cradle or swing that rocks, rock her for a few minutes until her sleep is deeper, then move away. Babies often sleep better in swings for several reasons. First, the shape of the swing is more similar to being held in arms than a flat mattress, second, the movement simulates mom's movement, and third, the inclined position makes babies who suffer with GERD or refux more safer and more comfortable, and it also helps babies whose ustation tubes are not yet at the right angle (this is common in babies, and causes ear infections, though they usually grow out of it by age 3 or 4).

When she is a little older you can try the crib again. Just sit with her and put your hand on her back until she falls asleep. If she cries, just comfort her by petting her with your hands and singing or cooing to her, but don't pick her up. Gradually, stop letting your hand rest on her, and just sit near by to comfort when she cries--only when she cries, not when she just stirs around a bit. It will take a long time the first few weeks, but she will get used to it soon and be able to comfort herself. If she is crying for more than two or three hours, you might want to wait until she's a little older.

I do not recommend letting her cry alone. Research has shown that allowing an infant to cry for more than 10 minutes without coming in to comfort them results in separation anxiety issues during the toddler and preschool age. (The baby develops an ingrained fear that you might not come if she needs you (because sometimes you come, and sometimes you don't). By always coming when she calls, you instill a confidence that, while you might not actually do what she wants you do to when she calls, you WILL always come, therefore, she knows she is always safe. This is ingrained pretty early on and is difficult to change later on--it sort of becomes a personality trait)

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You could try putting her in her own bed after she has already fallen asleep, so she wakes up in there routinely. With my kids I started bouncing them to sleep in a bouncer then putting them in their crib when they fell asleep. Then at around 3-4 months old I started putting them in their crib awake - but tired, to fall asleep on their own.

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