PARENTING MY SON while living with Grandparents!!! HELP!! :O

Maria - posted on 08/20/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )




I currently own my home, I am a single mom. My son is almost 7. When I purchased my home my mom moved in with my son and me. Its a three bedroom and she helped me out imensly!! My father has always been close to my son and even more so after my divorce when at the time my son was 9 months. about two years ago my father lost his house and I offered a home to him in our both of my parents live with us and they do co-parent as I work a full time job and attended and completed school. The problem is that my father has a strong personality....and I cant seem to be able to disciplin my own child in my own house. Everything turns into a huge argument....the smallest thing, it could even be if I tell my son to pick up his toys or something like that....grandpa comes in and "protects" him from mean mom!! I dont want to be the "bad guy" also if he doesnt like the way Im disciplining my son he argues with me in front of him when Ive asked him not to. My son recently apologized because he thinks its his fault we argue....I dont want my son to carry guilt from something that can be avoided if my dad just gave me my place in parenting. Its been happening more lately and I just cant take it son loves him to death.....but Im stuck between a rock and wall ...any suggestions...thoughts,...experiences....etc.....


[deleted account]

you need to make a firm stand with your parents. while they 'co parent' with you, ultimately YOU are the child's parent and have the final say in how things are done. I would sit them down for a chat and tell them how it is, set some boundaries, and do not make room for 'if they are not followed'. Its going to come down to how you deliver the conversation. If you appear to be asking your parents to back off rather than telling, chances are they will walk all over you. This worked for me, and i hope it works for you. Also, remind your father of the damage he's doing by encouraging your son to play you off of each other (even though your son may not be doing that yet, its not a good behaviour to have encouraged), and also of the impacts of conflict/resolution modelling and how that needs to be handled. put your foot down!

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