Possibly offensive question

Hannah - posted on 03/26/2009 ( 426 moms have responded )

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My hubby watches/looks at porn...not around me, and not all the time. But he has a playboy that I "allow" in the bathroom. And he looks at/watches it on my computer, it seems like every time I leave the house during the day with the baby he does this. It totally hurts my feelings and pisses me off...Is this something normal and OK for him to do? I do not confront him about it...I just feel all unwanted when I see what hes looked at and how my nice thick lotion is misplaced. Am I overreacting?

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Jennifer - posted on 03/26/2009

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As a wife and a couples therapist.. this issue comes up a lot. It is my opinion that masterbation is perfectly ok and can even be done in a sexual way with you involved. But whenever something he is doing is making your hair on your arm stand up and making you feel this hurt then it is not ok and he needs to work on meeting your needs as a partner..Some wife's would be 100% ok with it and some are not.. but it sounds like it is interfering with your relationship - therefore a problem. Ask him to refrain from pornography for 30 days and if he can not then he may want to look into this as a possible sex addiction.. you may want to seek the help of a marraige counselor to start talking about this with an unbiased 3rd party... Jenn

Kathleen - posted on 03/26/2009

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No, sorry. All men do not look at porn and my husband says he will be glad to come on and explain it to the poor woman who thinks I'm in denial about it. My husband and I are in our 50s and we sure do enjoy an adventurous sex life that is based on trust and exclusivity. Does he visually check out other younger women in real life? Duh. However, that's about a million miles away from the anti-intimacy use of porn in my books. I don't believe my husband has any difficulty 'resisting' porn as the few times he's been dragged to strip bars he found it embarrassing - not the nudity and dancing, etc. but as he tells it, "I couldn't stop thinking 'that's somebody's daughter or wife or mom'." We have six children between us including our youngest 11 year old girl. I love the example their Dad has set for them - that sex is a beautiful, healthy activity - if you hide something about it (like sneaking in porn when your partner's out) or someone is being hurt by it (and you obviously are) then you're doing it wrong! I know lots of women who like it and/or share it with their husbands, etc. - that's all fine as that's their thing but it isn't mine and it obviously isn't yours. I hope you can resolve this because to tell you the truth, I wouldn't be too happy with a guy who was willing to give it up for me, I want a guy who already understands the potential harm to me, to our relationship, to our family and maybe to women in general. Good luck and stay true to yourself.

Eleanor - posted on 03/26/2009

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Where to start, I had the same thing happen to me and then he started to compair me to these women and even bodybuilder women.  You look thin and very attractive, I believe you really need to sit down and talk to him and tell him how you feel, don't let it get out of hand.  My EX now is addicted to porn.  Be careful...

Anna - posted on 03/27/2009

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Quoting Rose:



Quoting Crystal:




i think that its totally normal. and if someone said their hubby doesnt look or watch porn, then they dont know or in denial.. i think its ok as long as they arent replacing you with the porn. if he does it too often then maybe bring up what your feeling. but i think its normal. i hope this helped a bit










This is a big load of CRAP!!! My husband doesn't watch or look at porn, and I'm not in denial!! Maybe you are the one that is, My husband thinks it's very disrespectful to look at something like that. Heck for that matter we don't even have it in our home. Maybe you should worry about your relationship!





Just because someone watches porn doesnt mean that they need to "worry" about their relationship! So because I watch it does he have to worry? For that reason I dont worry about him, it actually HELPS some relationships, so dont judge, to each their own.



Speaking from experience, Im not cheating on him when I watch porn, I just get visual and sound stimulation, I could care less who is on the screen, or in the picture Im not thinking I want to have sex with that person. However if it was US, all the better! For both of us!

Maybe make something for him to watch of you. He could be waiting till your gone with the kids not so that you can be gone, but more so that the KIDS are gone. Im almost positive hed rather be alone with you than a magazine or dvd, thats just whats left available to him

Kate CP - posted on 03/26/2009

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Quoting Debbie:



You are not overreacting and it is not OK for a healthy marriage! You truly need to watch the movie "Fireproof". And more importantly...your husband needs to see it!  Your response is natural and unfortunately you need to confront it. Pornagraphy is extremely addictive  and can lead to many other socialy unacceptable behaviors.  Please seek help in this matter!  This is not NORMAL! It may be acceptable with some people...but not anyone with a happy Marriage.  We have been married 26 years and part of the commitment is to cherish your spouse.  You are not being treated with respect and certainly not cherished.  There are times you need to demand & expect respect...This is one of those times!  If your husband is man of any integrity or character...He will respect you more for demanding it of him!





I have a happy marriage and I acknowledge that my husband looks at porn occasionally. He absolutely HATES strip clubs and the like. My feeling is it's just a picture and as long as he still comes to me for satisfaction then I don't mind.  If a woman is okay with it then there shouldn't be a problem. Now, if a woman is NOT okay with it then obviously something needs to be done. I don't have a problem with it as long as he's not substituting porn for me (and he's not). But I do have a happy marriage-been together almost 11 years and we have a beautiful 3 year old daughter. I think pornography can be addictive if the person already has an addictive personality. I think a LITTLE pornography IS normal. Sex is a business that sells and everyone buys it: from food to clothing to movies to TV to porn. Those who take it to the next extreme are the ones in need of help. 

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Hannah - posted on 04/04/2009

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Hey Thanks to all the women who posted. Things are much better! Thank you for all the advice!

Kristy - posted on 04/04/2009

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no you are not over reacting I too feel this way. Just be honest with him that its bugging you  thats what i had to do with my husband. this is coming from 12 years experiance

Kristy - posted on 04/04/2009

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no you are not over reacting I too feel this way. Just be honest with him that its bugging you  thats what i had to do with my husband. this is coming from 12 years experiance

Kristy - posted on 04/04/2009

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no you are not over reacting I too feel this way. Just be honest with him that its bugging you  thats what i had to do with my husband. this is coming from 12 years experiance

Andrea - posted on 04/04/2009

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You are not overreacting!! It is hurtful to know whenever you leave he is looking at other women in a sexual way. It is normal to look and want to watch that, but not when it is obviously hurting you!! Talk to him and tell him what you feel. There is no reason he needs to give it up totally, just cut back and maybe go with you and the baby when you leave. Spending more time together may help him realize what a hot catch he has and he will want to spend more time looking at you naked!!

Victoria - posted on 04/04/2009

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Quoting Crystal:



i think that its totally normal. and if someone said their hubby doesnt look or watch porn, then they dont know or in denial.. i think its ok as long as they arent replacing you with the porn. if he does it too often then maybe bring up what your feeling. but i think its normal. i hope this helped a bit





First, not all men look at or watch porn.  It's a fact and that doesn't mean they are hiding it or that we are in denial.  Trust me, my husband has no interest in it.



 



I don't think there is any rule to whether or not it is ok.  It all depends on what is ok and what works in your relationship.  Some people don't have a problem with it and some do.  Just talk to him.  He may have no idea that it bothers you.

Margaret - posted on 04/04/2009

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Quoting Melanie:



I agree with many of the posters, you need to talk to him.  One other thing you need to think about is that you now have a child in the house, and although it may not be an issue now, children are natural curios and look in cabinets etc...  What happens when your child or your child's friend find daddy's playboy or dvd's or files on the computer.  I worked as a Case Manager in a Juvinile Sex Offender treatment center and some of the young children we had (age 10-13) were often exposed to porn by discovering parents 'stash's'.  Your views on healthy sexuality will get passed down to your child.





im sure the stashes they found didnt just contain regular playboys either, OMG dont panic the girl if h was accessing illegal material which is what you are referring too, then she would be hysterical and calling the police not posting it here, be honest with her and dont be a panic merchant. inciting panic and discord in a home is just as harmful as the illegal material you are referring too

Lisa - posted on 04/04/2009

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Quoting Rose:



Quoting Crystal:




i think that its totally normal. and if someone said their hubby doesnt look or watch porn, then they dont know or in denial.. i think its ok as long as they arent replacing you with the porn. if he does it too often then maybe bring up what your feeling. but i think its normal. i hope this helped a bit










This is a big load of CRAP!!! My husband doesn't watch or look at porn, and I'm not in denial!! Maybe you are the one that is, My husband thinks it's very disrespectful to look at something like that. Heck for that matter we don't even have it in our home. Maybe you should worry about your relationship!






yes i agree!!! im so glad that my marrage is honest and true! we don't have such secrets!

Margaret - posted on 04/04/2009

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lol consider the responses in the 'you are not overreacting' to be from neurotic women because they are, it is completely normal, go shopping get some sexy langerie, and rub the lotion on yourself and you are gorgeous if you cant get his attention then standing right in front of him like that, then you have a problem. speak to him about it honestly dont get hysterical, you might find you manage to create an even closer relationship than you had before many women just can't come to terms with it, and it really is quite unhealthy for those who can't



men are visual if he needs to see something to ease the urges then he does, IF however he was going out for hours and lieing to you about where he is then its a problem, 



I can imagine he is quite embarrassed enough that you have posted his wanking habits on a public website.



all men masterbate its a healthy thing, sexual activity daily is healthy, if thats not happening dont complain about his activities it could be much worse, and if he is relieving daily his production rate should be relatively normal without too many complications. more kids???

Chrissy - posted on 04/04/2009

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I dont think there isn't a women who hasn't been through it. My first husband didnt look at pron he went out and found women instead.... I would rather the computer thing than that. My second husband loves the internet. In my opinion there should be a few ground rules. forst he doesn't lie about it, second, he doesnt replace you with it, third no Live chat. He can look but nothing real. Third he should not compair you to any of the "WOMEN" he is looking at. Four. It should not interfere with the REAL world. Five. He should talk to you about it. and allow you to tell him how you feel.  As far as the lotion being misplaced... God created sex toy stores for a reason. Go in to one. they are amazing. Learn to really enjoy your self. as long as he is not doing any thing with any one else, and you should enjoy time with your self. Maybe if he thinks he is missing out, he will stop the porn and come looking for you. My husband would look at porn in the evenings when I was sleeping.. Or so he thought. I would get my self off and every time he dropped the computer and came to bed.... LOL... play him at his own game.... it is fun.  and after the sex is amazing.

Jennifer - posted on 04/04/2009

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you don't know me but i'll give you some advice anyway.this is not normal behavior,i don't care who says it is or how much your husband tries to tell you it's ok.he shouldn't be doing this at all really,your not over reacting at all.it's completely disrespectful to you and your children.he is bringing other woman into your house,most likely ones you can't compete with ,right?not to mention what will your kids think when they finally discover what type of woman dady realy wants.he's makeing you feel inadequate and thats exactly what your daughter will think if she ever finds these things,he will be showing her that she will get more attention if she acts like a whore.if it makes you feel bad about yourself than it's a bad thing,he should be makeing you feel beautiful and desired by him,not inadequate and self conciouse.plain and simple,it's wrong in so many ways and it ruins thousands of marriages everyday! he is wrong! and why is he so quick to do this when your not home? because it's an affair in his mind and he doesn't want you in it.i'm not trying to hurt you ,i just want to be blunt because i know what your saying and thats why i am not with that guy today.

Sonia - posted on 04/04/2009

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I just can't believe alot of women think its normal. All men do not look at porn. Just because some men do, does not mean its normal anad nothing to worry about. Alot of men cheat too, but we would never allow that or say its normal. The idea thats its normal and nothing to worry about is in my opinion ridiculous. Plus, looking at porn and getting off on it is doing the same thing emotionally to your husband that cheating would do. He is still getting off on another woman.

Chama - posted on 04/04/2009

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Hey, I wld say most if not all men look @ porn, but it its knockin ur confidence u shld definately talk about it to him, as women hate our bodies most of the time n more so after having kids, n the last person that shld make u feel less confident is ur hubby. I wldnt say he's lookin @ in a sense of what he might have in the flesh, i think its just a fantasy thing. remember u cant make a w**** a hse wife(n thats all they are)(soz to be harsh to anyone that makes a living by degrading themselves), they've got nothing on you hun. hope u manage to get around this issue, all the best.x

Tiffany - posted on 04/04/2009

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I think it is normal. I went through a phase with my husband was like that.  After awhile he will get bored with it and realize it is stupid because he has the real thing and a great thing going on right in front of him.  Just hang in there a little longer.

Josie - posted on 04/04/2009

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if it bothers you then confront him! its normal but he should know how you feel abut it so tell him x

Ann - posted on 04/04/2009

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As so many people have said looking at porn is OK as long as you are both OK with it. Many men think that women don't want to have sex after children due to the pain/discomfort of childbirth and they can think that by looking at porn and relieving themselves they are actually doing us a favour!! Like everybody else has said you need to talk to him about why he does this and EXACTLY how it makes you feel without arguing - hard I know but give it a try. I think you will be pleasantly surprised at the outcome - just make sure you approach it with an open mind. Just remember that "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus" the key to a good relationship is communication - I learnt this 2nd time around, my x never used to talk about anything part of why we're not together now, my finance and I talk about everything which is why 10 years on he still makes my stomach flip and my heart race! Good luck and remember sex should be enjoyable for you both.

Connie - posted on 04/04/2009

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Iam 67 and although I didn't have that concern I would say I have heaqrd from my older friends that they have had that problem and they either ignored it or spoke with their hubby about it to let him know how they felt. It may just be he needs to be let known that it hurts you.

Traci - posted on 04/03/2009

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i dismiss all of it, i figure hes there at home and not searching elsewhere, even though you may not do it hes goin to no matter what. i wouldnt get that worked up over it. i would maybe ask to put the mag's away so your not always reminded, what you dont know wont hurt

Traci - posted on 04/03/2009

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i dismiss all of it, i figure hes there at home and not searching elsewhere, even though you may not do it hes goin to no matter what. i wouldnt get that worked up over it. i would maybe ask to put the mag's away so your not always reminded, what you dont know wont hurt

[deleted account]

No, you're not overreacting. Porn is an addiction, and it is harmful to marriages. The emotional pain a wife feels when her husband looks at porn is very real. I know from experience. I do not have all the answers. I just know that you and your husband need help getting through this. A good resource is the "Every Man" book series. Of course, it is also always helpful to talk to a professional or a pastor about this. I hope this helps. God bless!

[deleted account]

My husband also looks at porn, I think it is normal for men to do this.  I spoke to my husband about it and he is just interested in the female body, he loves me and loves my body but it excites him to see others playing out scenes that he doesn't do with me.  Have you tried watching some porn with him?  Bet you are the one he has a good time with? Don't take it personally and talk to him about it, he might not know that it bothers you so much.

Tracey - posted on 04/03/2009

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I WOULD PROBABLY FEEL THE SAME WAY.  I DO KNOW GUYS WHO ARE LIKE THAT THOUGH, AND JUST LIKE, CAN'T REALLY HELP IT.  MY HUSBAND NEVER DOES ANY OF THAT STUFF.  WE MAY PURCHASE A MOVIE, BUT WE WATCH IT TOGETHER.  MAYBE YOU SHOULD TALK TO HIM ABOUT IT.

Wendy - posted on 04/03/2009

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No you're not.  Talk to him, explain how it makes you feel.  You shouldn't have to feel like that ever.  He will most likely understand.

Kate CP - posted on 04/03/2009

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Quoting Jocelyn:



Quoting Lynsi:

Porn is more addictive than anything - even cocain. It distorts a persons view of what "normal" is. First off marriage includes RESPECT and if you are upset about it you have a right to let him know how it makes you feel. My dear friend is going thru the same thing with her husband and she's done a lot of reading into how to fix it. Have you seen the movie Fireplace? I dont think you are overreacting. You have to work hard in your marriage and if you take an active role in maintaining it you'll head off things that could develop into huge problems. Best of luck!





In what way is porn more addicting than cocain!??! This I really don't understand at all.  It seems to me that you must have a pretty warped view on addictions.  Have you ever been addicted to drugs?  I have been down that path before and I know plenty of other ppl who have been down the drug path; some recovered, some didn't.  I do understand that porn can be addicting, as can sex and gambling, and work, and excersise, and food, and lieing, the list goes on and on.  Anything can be addicting, but to compare porn to HARD DRUGS?  People can watch porn a few times, people can't smoke meth just a few times.  You smoke it once and you have an 80% chance that you will do it again, and after that you have a 5% chance that you WON"T become addicted to it.  Heroin and morphine accounted for 51% of drug deaths ruled accidental or unexpected in 1999.  I have yet to hear of porn killing anyone.  Sharing porn does not cause blood disease such as hiv and hepititus, as sharing needles do.  Now I'm not saying that porn can't be an addiction, but there are a hell of a lot more ppl out there addicted to drugs and drinking.  You should really get out there and maybe expeirence an addiction before you make a comment like that.  I challenge you to go volunteer at a drug rehab centre and then visit a sex addiction group.  Then let me know which group has an easier time stopping.  Which group has more people.  Which group has more teenagers.  How many are Christian.   Please do some research before you lump together porn and cocaine.  





*applauds* Right on the money, sister!

Jocelyn - posted on 04/03/2009

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Quoting Lynsi:

Porn is more addictive than anything - even cocain. It distorts a persons view of what "normal" is. First off marriage includes RESPECT and if you are upset about it you have a right to let him know how it makes you feel. My dear friend is going thru the same thing with her husband and she's done a lot of reading into how to fix it. Have you seen the movie Fireplace? I dont think you are overreacting. You have to work hard in your marriage and if you take an active role in maintaining it you'll head off things that could develop into huge problems. Best of luck!


In what way is porn more addicting than cocain!??! This I really don't understand at all.  It seems to me that you must have a pretty warped view on addictions.  Have you ever been addicted to drugs?  I have been down that path before and I know plenty of other ppl who have been down the drug path; some recovered, some didn't.  I do understand that porn can be addicting, as can sex and gambling, and work, and excersise, and food, and lieing, the list goes on and on.  Anything can be addicting, but to compare porn to HARD DRUGS?  People can watch porn a few times, people can't smoke meth just a few times.  You smoke it once and you have an 80% chance that you will do it again, and after that you have a 5% chance that you WON"T become addicted to it.  Heroin and morphine accounted for 51% of drug deaths ruled accidental or unexpected in 1999.  I have yet to hear of porn killing anyone.  Sharing porn does not cause blood disease such as hiv and hepititus, as sharing needles do.  Now I'm not saying that porn can't be an addiction, but there are a hell of a lot more ppl out there addicted to drugs and drinking.  You should really get out there and maybe expeirence an addiction before you make a comment like that.  I challenge you to go volunteer at a drug rehab centre and then visit a sex addiction group.  Then let me know which group has an easier time stopping.  Which group has more people.  Which group has more teenagers.  How many are Christian.   Please do some research before you lump together porn and cocaine.  

Melanie - posted on 04/03/2009

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I agree with many of the posters, you need to talk to him.  One other thing you need to think about is that you now have a child in the house, and although it may not be an issue now, children are natural curios and look in cabinets etc...  What happens when your child or your child's friend find daddy's playboy or dvd's or files on the computer.  I worked as a Case Manager in a Juvinile Sex Offender treatment center and some of the young children we had (age 10-13) were often exposed to porn by discovering parents 'stash's'.  Your views on healthy sexuality will get passed down to your child.

Sarah - posted on 04/03/2009

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Think of it this way..   would you rather him see it or do it? 



I have no problem with my husband looking at stuff like that as long as it is in private. 



Its totally normal...its a guy thing!!

Lynsi - posted on 04/03/2009

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Porn is more addictive than anything - even cocain. It distorts a persons view of what "normal" is. First off marriage includes RESPECT and if you are upset about it you have a right to let him know how it makes you feel. My dear friend is going thru the same thing with her husband and she's done a lot of reading into how to fix it. Have you seen the movie Fireplace? I dont think you are overreacting. You have to work hard in your marriage and if you take an active role in maintaining it you'll head off things that could develop into huge problems. Best of luck!

Jessica - posted on 04/03/2009

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oh no your not overreacting!!!! how would he feel if you were looking and fantazing about other guys?? i bet he wouldnt like it. you should confront him, just let him no how you feel.  i had this same problem with my guy, i caught him watching it and i just told him how it made me feel like he wants other girls and how bad i felt. he hasnt looked at it since. good luck

Brenda - posted on 04/03/2009

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depends. my husband started watching porn then coming to bed to "play" with me. that bothered me and i finally said something. it stopped. and that was before i ever became a mom. he said that he didnt realize that i saw it as an insult. we watched porn together and still do ocassionally.  when we can find the time. you do need to talk to him and let him know whats going on. maybe you can enjoy it wth him sometimes. one of the reasons my husband has an ex is because she wouldnt even try to work with him.

Jatxgirl - posted on 04/03/2009

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Hannah~  What a good question.  First and foremost if you are a Christian, you need to pray for him to be delivered from this terrible sin.  Pornography is a true addiction as I know people that struggle with this.  You have to take a stand.  I'm sure your hubby is a wonderful guy underneath, but he is putting pornography before  his marriage.  That rarely works, just look at the stats.  I see you have a beautiful daugther, Congrats!  If you can't see it being wrong because it is being done to You, then please see that this absolutely wrong for a father to do this to his daughter.  She doesn't want to grow up around porn.  I will definitely keep you in my prayers.  Don't give up on your husband as he does love you.

Leslie - posted on 04/03/2009

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Sounds like you and your husband have a problem.  I would not allow pornographic material in my house with a small child around.  You have a cute daughter, and she is getting bigger and will soon find that magazine in the bathroom and it may scare her.  When will your husband stop being satisfied with the porn and start trying to make his fantasies a reality?  I think you both should seek counseling together.  This is not normal, and you don't deserve this blatant act of disrespect.

Laura - posted on 04/03/2009

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Quoting Lisa:



What you need is a date night!!! Get dressed up (not mommy like)  something sexy, its all about feeling sexy!!  Your a "Mom" and sometimes our emotions or views change towards such subjects. Relax, be a little naughty yourself - it's ok. It's actually healthy.





Great idea! You could offer him a massage with that nice lotion of yours, its clearly a brand he enjoys!! Subtle opportunity to remark how quickly you seem to be getting through it these days!!!

Megan - posted on 04/03/2009

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Do you still get loved on??  Porn is ok as long as it's not an addiction....Maybe you could ask him to lay off for a bit?



 

Jessica - posted on 04/03/2009

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Don't overreact! That just starts an unwanted fight... Yes its normal for both of you! He is just looking. It's better than him getting some strange. Yes it hurts.Maks us feel not as sexy as what hes looking at.. It kinda depends on your sex life.. try more if thats not it talkto him about it but avoid a fight.. let him know how it makes you feel... and trust alittle more pretend there is no history on the computer... oh and buy him his own lotion then he will leave yours alone...It used to bother me sooo much but thats just how men are! Hope this helps



Jessica

Kate - posted on 04/03/2009

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Hell NO! Tell him he either packs it in or he can leave via the door! Dirty Bastard! What is wrong with him that he needs to look at pictures instead of being with a real woman ie his wife?

Kate - posted on 04/03/2009

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Hell NO! Tell him he either packs it in or he can leave via the door! Dirty Bastard! What is wrong with him that he needs to look at pictures instead of being with a real woman ie his wife?

Louise - posted on 04/03/2009

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hi huni, this is totally normal, some blokes just like looking at porn and havea higher sex drive than some others every one is different. i no it may hurt but it really isnt anyting u have done wrong and he wont even associate this with anything to d with u. he may not be getting the amount of attention he uses to get as u now have a lovely baby girl now that is getting most of ur attention. really huni, dont worry bout it. IT IS NORMAL and lots of men do it if u r really feeling that bad about it make it known to him, talk to him about it, i gurantee he will not have even thought that he would have hurt ur feelings , men are stupid sometimes !!! lol. hope this sort of makes u feel a lil better, but deffiantly talk to him bout it if its only jus started since u had the baby he might jus be feeling neglected.xxxxx

Victoria - posted on 04/03/2009

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Nothing wrong with a little porn! Maybe you guys should look at it together! I only think it would be an issue if it kept him from doing other things, like going out or something like that. I would rather have my man look at porn all day than to oogle over other women that we see out and about.

Nicole - posted on 04/03/2009

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Ugh I think a lot of men do this. And I understand your frusturation-I felt that way too. And tell him to stop using YOUR lotion. If he watches it frequently or you feel like he is addicted he might need help. I heard recently that porn addiction is harder to stop than cocaine. CRAZY!

[deleted account]

Quoting Hannah:



The more I hear from you ladies, the better I feel about it. I think we have one of those relationships that, him watching porn sometimes, wont hinder. I think the main problem is my lack of confidence. He still sleeps with me regularly, and he isnt addicted to the porn. So I think ill do more things for myself and quit being jealous because he is!





I had a huge lack of confidence too. Since I know he likes to look at things and since men are very visual when it comes to sex, I let him take pics just for him. This way when he's looking at stuff, it's me in the pictures and not some other random woman. I used to feel it was almost like cheating, so this was my solution...and it worked wonders!

User - posted on 04/03/2009

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I dont think youa re overreacting, maybe he needs to be told to spend his time and attenti9on he is using for watching pron on making youf eel beautiful and wonderful? Like a back rub, making a nice meal for you... and then you may be more interested in satisfying both of your needs. I know my husband wants sex, but after being groped all day by a baby and not showering and trying desperately to take care of everything else I certainly am not goign to initiate sex! These men need to put in some extra effort, and take care of mom's needs since mom doesnt have the time!

User - posted on 04/03/2009

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I dont think youa re overreacting, maybe he needs to be told to spend his time and attenti9on he is using for watching pron on making youf eel beautiful and wonderful? Like a back rub, making a nice meal for you... and then you may be more interested in satisfying both of your needs. I know my husband wants sex, but after being groped all day by a baby and not showering and trying desperately to take care of everything else I certainly am not goign to initiate sex! These men need to put in some extra effort, and take care of mom's needs since mom doesnt have the time!

Eva - posted on 04/03/2009

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If it really bothers you and plays on your insecurities you need to address this with him.  I think that porn is fine but if its in excess it becomces an addidtion. Hope this helps

Eva - posted on 04/03/2009

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If it really bothers you and plays on your insecurities you need to address this with him.  I think that porn is fine but if its in excess it becomces an addidtion. Hope this helps

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