pregnant again

CJ - posted on 01/03/2011 ( 5 moms have responded )




Hi, I am a mom of a 8 year old and a toddler of 17 months and just found out I am pregnant again. I should be overjoyed but have mixed emotions and not sure how to feel. Is there anyone in the same situation as me as I would like some advice or opinions. I will be 40 in October 2011 and this is huge, I really did not want anymore kids and I was on the pill but none the less it happened. I am only 6 weeks but have had 5 miscarriages after my daughter, so at this point not sure what to expect.


[deleted account]

My SIL was 40 when she found she was pregnant with her son, she already had two children a daughter, who was 18 and a son who was 15. It was a huge shock for her, she had not intended on having any more children hers were pretty much grown up. She now has a wonderful 3 yo who she couldn't imagine her life without.

It is quite common to feel mixed emotions especially when you have such a shock, this sounds like the last thing you expected. You may also be feeling a little unsure due to the fact you have had several miscarriages and so don't want to get attached to the baby just in case, you may find that once you have passed the 'problem' time you will relax a little and start to look forward to the baby. Don't put pressure on yourself to feel a certain way, you will only make yourself feel worse, there is no particular way you should feel, everyone feels differently, everyones hormones are different, it doesn't make you a bad person to not be jumping for joy that you are pregnant again, it makes you human - let yourself get used to the idea that you are pregnant.


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[deleted account]

CJ, I can understand where you're coming from with the baby weight - I had lost all my baby weight plus some and am now pregnant again and am putting on weight so quickly, the way I am looking at it is I have done it once I can do it again - so can you don't let the weight gain get you down.

Instead of lookng at the negative aspect that a baby takes a lot of time, focus on how you can still spend time with your children, maybe once or twice a week you and your daughter can have some girl time while daddy looks after the other two and while your daughter is at school and baby is on nap you can have some one on one with your toddler. Include your children with the baby as well, let them help you look after the baby - they love helping and it'll help them bond too. As for hubby he can fit in when and as, sneak hugs and kisses when you can.

You are not letting people down you just have to adapt the way you do things to include an extra person. The only people that matter are you and your family, have you spoken to them about how you feel? You may find you are worrying for no reason because I bet they don't feel like you are letting them down.

Heather - posted on 01/04/2011




Just beacuse your kids are younger doesn't mean it will be more difficult. I think sometimes it's harder after you have been out of the diaper, bottles, burp rags, playpens, car seats, etc. for ahwile and then have to get back into the routine. I planned my second child but it took us so long to get pregnant that my daughter was 5 when he was born. I was really dismayed at the amount of junk I now had to cart around with me because of the new baby. I think it owuld have been easier on me if they wre closer together and I wouldn't have gotten so used to having an independant child. Try to stay positive, it will be better for both of you. Good luck.

CJ - posted on 01/04/2011




Hi Toni

thanx for that however I think I would handle it better if my kids were older, my toddler is such a handful and my daughter really gets left out a lot because of this. I just feel like I would be letting a lot of people down, not too mention the fact that I have lost 40lbs, most of the baby weight just to go through this again...I am so not happy.

Sneaky - posted on 01/03/2011




I would comment, but Toni's reply was so perfect I have nothing to add :o)

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