Sister in law sends niece over in stained clothing

Cc - posted on 08/03/2018 ( 5 moms have responded )

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My brother shares custody of my 6 year old niece with her mother. EVERY SINGLE TIME she visits him, she comes in the exact same outfit. She comes in black leggings (no matter how hot it is that day) and a white tank top that has a huge stain on the stomach. We are unable to communicate with the mother due to court orders and restraining orders after a sloppy breakup. Any time my brother has sent her home in clothes he bought for her, my niece comes home and says her mom threw it in the garbage. She cries if you try to send her home with something that anyone from our side of the family gave her because "mommy will get mad." What is the drive behind sending her daughter in stained clothes? What is the logic behind it? Isn't throwing her belongings in the garbage in front of her a form of abuse?

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Michelle - posted on 08/18/2018

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There isn't any logic behind it and no one could even guess why she does it. Only she has that answer.
The best thing to do would be to ignore the dramas and just carry on doing things that won't result in her throwing things out.
She probably hates her ex and is being very petty about having anything that he has bought in her house. She not behaving like a grown woman but a very spoiled brat.

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Cc - posted on 08/17/2018

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Yes, it is very simple and that is what he does. I was asking for people's opinion on the logic behind this. I've never shared custody of a child so I can't imagine what the reason behind this is.

Michele - posted on 08/07/2018

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Your brother needs to keep clothes and shoes at his house and change her as soon as he gets here and then put her back in her same clothes to go home. Seems pretty simple to me

Michelle - posted on 08/05/2018

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Who knows what she is thinking by doing that. The easy way to ignore it would be to send her home is the same clothes she arrived in. It would stop your niece getting upset and then the ex can't play the games that she is.

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