Son soiling underwear at school!!!

Philippine - posted on 04/21/2014 ( 2 moms have responded )




My 4.5 year old son has accidents at school daily. It breaks my heart because now I have overheard his peers telling him he stinks and refusing to sit beside him. I have tried so many different approaches to coaching him to poop and pee on the toilet but it is almost like he does not care or is affected by the feel of wet underwear or the smell??!! He was toilet trained for about a year - then after he had a UTI I noticed he regressed. His teacher is VERY patient and encourages him to go to the toilet frequently but he is quite defiant and refuses to go because he is so engaged in the activity, i.e water table. He is in Junior Kindergarten 5 full days and this has been ongoing since June 2013. I have tried sticker charts. I have tried rewarding him with an outing to his favorite ice cream shop. I have tried being very nonchallant and saying - OOPs you had an accident lets clean up. Unfortunately, I have had to throw out so many pairs of underwear and pants because I can not get the smell of urine or feces out of them. It has become a struggle with my husband and I as we have different approaches on dealing with it. His pediatrician is not concerned and despite my telling him about three times that I am concerned his approach is - "keep it positive Mom and put him back in pull ups!" We are currently seeing a chiropractor to see if that will help him but it is very expensive. PLEASE - any advice would be appreciated.


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Elikini - posted on 04/21/2014




Are you able to go with him to school? where you can monitor the hours/time of the ay that he has this accident? if you are able to, that is a great practice too that Drs. might need data of its frequent occurrence and to measure the hours too. Perhaps a strict routine at home of toileting, monitor his drinks and food and how often he needs to go to toilet. It will help him and you both mum and dad, to know just the type of food that makes him go regularly to toilet. May be talk to him too, if he is having troubles going to toilet that he may need a buddy to go with, and then let the teacher know to set up a buddy system for toileting time. A follow-up from previous Dr's reports would be helpful with the future Dr's observation of the child's toileting and behaviours in general. All the Very Best to you and to your child,

Jodi - posted on 04/21/2014




He is probably a bit too young for school. Here, the age most people send their kids to school is 5, before that they are in pre-school, which is only either half days or 2 days a week.
Given your 4 1/2 year old has been in school since June last year, he sounds WAY too young.

I never understand this pressure to send our children to school so young. It doesn't give them any academic advantage.

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