Son will not poo without his diapers! HELP

[deleted account] ( 9 moms have responded )

My son just turn 3. He will not poo without his diapers. I told him i hv no more diapers to give him and he hv to poo in the potty. So far he has been holding it in for 5 days already. I wonder how long will he hold it for? I know he will poo at the end but i am concern with his health right now.

What should i do?


View replies by

Goh - posted on 06/29/2009




I experienced the same thing when my son was 2 1/2 years. I used to wait while he was 'pushing' for his poo and when he's about to do it, I will quickly rush him to the toilet seat and will not allow him to come off it until he does it. It was a very long wait the first time, and both my maid and I rotate to make sure he stays on the toilet seat! We waited almost 2 hours until he could not hold any longer and finally did it. We cheered and made a big fuss over his achievements and since that day, he is not afraid anymore and always uses the toilet for his big business.

Kristi - posted on 06/29/2009




.Hi Karen, I have the same thing with my 7YEAR OLD. I understand it is very hard to deal with. He would pee on the potty and sit on the potty to poo but would not do anything! Yes, it does get to you. I started with Benefiber for Children just to give him that ex. fiber to make him need to go so I could start to watch when he need to go. As soon as he would squat, I would take him to the bathroom. It got to the point he did not want to sit on the potty cause he would hurt his legs to sit there so, (i know this going to sound dumb) he would squat on the potty! It worked! So every night before bath time we "SQUAT" on the potty and make him go. After while if felt better then having it in his pants and all over him. So, he will get the feeling down of having to go and do it on his on. Don’t rush him, he will get it. At that age and of my son's age, they want to do it when they want to do it. Poo’ing on the potty is the only thing in their life right now they have control over. They want to make sure that nobody can take that control away for them. Good luck and wish u well

[deleted account]

Thanks guys. I gather lots of great ideas from here. I'll tried them out. By the way, he pooed on the 5th day in the big potty. Phew! and the following day too. Now i'm going to keep this up and be consistant daily putting him on the big potty.

I'm also training him to be diaper free during his afternoon naps and when he sleeps at night. So far it had been 4 days and it when alright. There are still some accidents at times, he can't control his wee wee 100% while he sleeps sometimes.

Greatfull for all your responds. :)

Maree - posted on 06/27/2009




Hi Karen, funny I had this with my youngest son, he wouldn't go poos at all unless he had a nappy on, and would also hold in for days and days.

What worked for him in the end was - I hid the potty and didn't bring it out again, I purchased a toilet seat that had a high lip around it and a part in the front so when he sat on it felt like he was on his potty, and I made a story up about the "naughty poos" and the only way we could get rid of it was to flush him down the toilet. He seems to like me telling him the story when he sat on the toilet, and before long it worked. You just need to be consistent with what you do, and once that potty goes, don't bring it back out. Also I found helpful to have a spare toilet seat in the car if we were visiting etc. Good luck and it does get easier !!! You will look back on this in a few years and laugh.....

Vicky - posted on 06/27/2009




My son was exactly the same. He would wee in the toilet no probs but had to have his nappy on for his poos. So I started off by letting him poo in his nappy but taking him to the toilet after he'd done it and tipping it into the loo and letting him flush it away. We'd wave good bye (ridiculous saying goodbye to a poo I know) but it meant he got used to the toilet and started to understand a little more. I finally decided that enough was enough and left him without a nappy on. He lasted 4 whole days and each night I gave him an extra long warm bath as that used to make him want to go...finally in the bath on the 4th day he had to go and went on the loo and we've not looked back since. Good luck x

[deleted account]

My son seemed scared at first too. He always wanted to put on a pull-up to go poo so I eventually got one of those small pottys (less intimidating) and let him sit on it while he was watching Dora or whatever cartoon happended to be on. He sat on it for a bit then started pushing...He was successful and I made a HUGE deal out of it, praising him, dancing, etc...The 2nd time he had to go, I moved the potty into the restroom. He was successful. The 3rd time, I sat him on the big potty and he was good to go. No more pull-ups, no more being scared. He had the enjoyment of going to daycare and telling his caregiver he was a big boy now cuz he poo-pooed in the potty!! YAYYYYY!

Jael - posted on 06/27/2009




Mine won't either and he is 2 years old. He cries when i mention sitting on the potty to poop. Ive tried treats priviate pottys in areas no one can see becaue he doesn;t like to be watched but he hates pooping n the potty! I feel your frustration.

[deleted account]

When my son was 2 years 3 months, he was afraid to let it out in the toilet and would cry when on the toilet out of fear if he had to poo. My mom gently held him on the toilet while he cried and when the urge came, he couldn't hold it and let it out in the big toilet. He was surprised that it wasn't that scary (or so it seemed), and after the first time he got over his fear. He was honestly trained in about 2 weeks, but he was a compliant child to begin with. A strong willed child will take more time and patience, and also a hyper-active one will take longer too because it's hard to get them to sit still on the toilet.

Another advantage I had was I was a stay-at-home mom who was consistently there to put them on the potty. Oh yeah, I used treats to train them on the potty too, like gummy bears, tiny bits of carmel, what ever they REALLY wanted. Whenever they went in the potty I would cheer and make a big deal out of it, and give them a treat. Positive reinforcement is a good motivator. Hey, if it works with dogs it can work with kids too :)

Mindi - posted on 06/26/2009




I think you are right to be concerned about his health at this point. Although I think you had a good idea to start with, he certainly isn't going along with it. If I were you, I would let him put on a diaper when he needs to poo. But have him tell you when he needs it so that he is wearing pants the rest of the time. Then just be very positive about how when he is old enough, he will poo in the potty like the other big boys do. By taking the pressure off, he will decide on his own to do it. If you are willing to give him rewards, you could buy something he likes a lot (for my son it was suckers). Have them in the bathroom, and tell him every time he poos in the potty, he can have one. You give him one each time until he is doing it regularly, then he won't need it anymore.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms