Stay at home Dads vs Stay at home Moms

Kristin - posted on 01/28/2012 ( 19 moms have responded )




If you could, would you allow you husband/boyfriend stay home with the kids while you work? Or would you rather?

I was in my psychology class and they were talking about equality in the work place, you know gender equality...and made me think of this. You know, if I could I would allow my husband to stay home with the kids while I work. :) I got to stay home the first two years of my oldest son's life and enjoyed every minute of it...and I would love it if he got to get that same feeling.

I know there are a few stay at home moms on this forum...but if you got to change places would you?


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Chet - posted on 10/25/2014




In Canada parents get a year of leave with a baby, and lots of parents split it. The mom stays home for the first six month and the dad stays home for the last six.

We've only ever had either me at home, both parents at home, or me and friend at home. My husband has worked from home on and off, and I've also had a friend live with us on and off.

I think that breastfeeding is really important though, and it's difficult to both nurse and work full time when baby is under 6 or 9 months.

Carrie - posted on 02/07/2012




Studies show that children thrive with a parent at home doesn't say which parent they just do better with a parent home. If I made more money and my husband wanted to I'd let him stay home.

Jodi - posted on 01/31/2012




If my husband wanted to, I would consider it. I am a SAHM, and it's something I've known I've wanted to do my entire life. I wrote my "What I want to be when I grow up." paper on it in the 3rd grade for career day! lol So for me, it might feel a little like giving up my dream. As it is, my husband has no interest in being a SAHD, which suites me just fine!

Kate CP - posted on 01/31/2012




I *like* staying home and I don't have the same kind of high-paying skill sets my husband does. He likes, I think we're happy the way we are. If we HAD to then yea, it would work. I'm confident in his ability to care for his kids. :)

Tcordukes - posted on 01/31/2012




My Husband as done a stint as a SAHD He loved every minute of it and so did our daughter. My Father had times when i was growing up where he would be the at home dad, I think if it works for your family why not it had benifits for all involved.

Medic - posted on 01/31/2012




We have done both and it worked fantastic. Now we are both full time students and the kids only go to daycare two days a week and we have managed to work it so that one of us is always home. We also homeschool and we do that 50/50 as well.

Stephanie - posted on 01/31/2012




Without a doubt I would. I'm a sahm and I love it and my husband works 5 days a week. He tells me all the time that if he had a chance to be a sahd he would. I'm in college right now, studying to be a teacher, and if one day I get a teaching job and he wants to stay home than he should!

Kaitlyn - posted on 01/30/2012




If DH wanted to stay home and we had the opportunity to change roles, I would absolutely let him. I love being the SAHM, but I would share the joys if he really wanted to experience them. He would be a great SAHD.

Katreena - posted on 01/30/2012




If I had the slightest chance of making enough to support our family on what my income would be if I were working, I would have my husband be a SAHD in a heartbeat. He was the one who wanted kids in the first place, whereas I had said I never wanted kids from the time I was 5 years old until hubby talked me into it. I love my son, don't get me wrong, but I miss working, and I don't enjoy the SAHM roll at all. My husband gives me lots of acknowledgement and support, and I really can't complain about that at all...I just feel stuck and miserable. He feels stuck and miserable having to work, but I cannot earn enough to even vaguely compare with what he makes.

[deleted account]

IF he wanted to, and I had a job that I loved as much as I loved being a sahm, then yes, of course I would let him try it.

As it is, though, he loves his job, it pays very well and is very secure, and I love being at home (working sporadically on freelance).

Melissa - posted on 01/30/2012




My husband is a stay at home dad. I love that he has the opportunity to bond with our children. Most men dont get the chance to create the type of bond he has with our kids. It would never make sense for me to leave my job. It started out as a nice convenience when he went back to school (online mostly), but has become all but a necessity since our daughter was born last August with Down Syndrome. We are lucky that my company allows me to provide for my family and work early enough in the day that I am home by mid afternoon and can still feel like i dont miss much at home (including the chores lol).

Iridescent - posted on 01/30/2012




Both my husband and myself work from home. It works well for us, and we would not change it. Our kids need both of us.

Sarah - posted on 01/30/2012




When our son was born, I stayed home for 9 months, my husband worked. Then I went to work for a year and he stayed home with our son. Then I went on mat leave again after I had our daughter and I stayed home for a year, went back to work for a month and took unpaid leave and am still off (she's 18m now) while my hubby works. I think having both their parents at home at different times has been good for the kids, they've formed a close relationship with both of us.

Kristin - posted on 01/28/2012





lol, I do agree that every parent should have equal chances to stay at home. Right now we both work and I still don't think he understands how hard it is to work full time and still take care of the kids. He is off work two days a week, Thursday and Sunday. Thursday is also my day off..but I work Sundays. With only ONE day a week by themselves...I don't think it is enough experience for him to comprehend what us mommies do for the family.

Joanna - posted on 01/28/2012




I was a stay-at-home mom until I went back to substitute teaching this school year. I think that the other spouse should get a chance to at least experience it so they can realize that it's not all fun and games and that in turn usually causes them to give the stay at home spouse more aknowledgement that their job is essential. But I would not choose to change places. If I could, I would prefer to be the one at home because of the closeness/bond it creates between you and your child. I also think that my spouse might of seriously screwed my kids up and not have been in tune to their physical and emotional needs. ;) Now my girls are old enough that they are both in school all day, but I do my best to be the one that's there for them before and after school and if they are sick or etc. And as a side note, I believe in the grand scheme of things equality in the work place is pretty equal other than that I believe overall women are still underpaid when compared to their male companions in the workplace. :)

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