Step-Parenting vs. Parents

Alyssa - posted on 07/10/2016 ( no moms have responded yet )




I am a proud step-mom. My wife has a 9 year daughter. I love her to death and would do ANYTHING for that little one. Well, when my spouse was with the father, they were yound around 17. Broke up and later on at 20, i came along. They were alrwady broken up due to his domestic violence, infidelity, and lies. When i met my step daughter she was 3 and has been with her since. We are very attached :)
Well, the father stopped seeing her from ages
3-5&1/2. He would only call to talk to my wife, and would offer any financial support. Maybe 20 dollars here and there. They both had many deals on visitationdays but he would always fail, and my wife and i had to drop out of achool because of it. My wife finally put child support on him, and since he has no papers to be here in america, i believe that is why he started picking her up every other weekend. He tried to hide and lie from child support services by giving an addressto his moms. Then giving an apartmentaddress but not his apartment number. But thanks to the little one, we got his number and reported it to C.S.S.
He continues to not really be with the child amd lets his Girlfriend and her family, and his mom, raise the little one. He always tells the little one since we are gay, we are going to hell. That she doesnt have to liten to me or follow my rules of the house etc... he doesnt want the little one having her phone because it has her GPS on because he and gf believe we are going to pop up where ever they are and start a scene even though we are NOTHING like that. She has her GPS on because she is 9 years old and she has a random tendencyto walk off or lose her phone. But he doesnt even know that because he never around. Although he lives 4 minutes from us. He has tried to change her school info to all his stuff. He is not supportive u less it gets him a chance to talk to my wife. He is emotionally abusive by telling my wife she is a bad Mom and telling our daughter she cant support us because are gay and she only has to love him and listen to him.
I asked if i can have some kind of guardian paperwork done so when i join back to the military i can get the little one medical benefits. He denied it even though he wasnt providing financial support or even benefits...she listens to me and doesnt listen to anyone else really. So ive been stuck with the responsibilityof discipline and everything. My wife works up to 10 hour days and is heart broken she cant be home more. So i spend the most time with her since i have a part time job...but i k ow there is boundries to being a step parent. I could really use some advice :(

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