This is extremely hard for me but I really need support

Mayra - posted on 12/30/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )




This is extremely hard for me but I really need support..Has anyone lost a child due to drowning in your own bathtub? I recently lost my beautiful 11 month old daughter and I truly I'm lost in my own excruciating pain and unbearable guilt.. I just can't seem to forgive myself for getting distracted for that short moment
To make things worst I truly believe that I could had saved her life had a known CPR but I didn't :'( so that adds more pain and guilt.. My princess still gave me the gift of lasting 12 days in the hospital.. While she was there she got even more beautiful and grew so much I prayed to god to please forgiving me for failing her as a mother that I wished I would have been a perfect mom that made no mistakes but I prayed for being human and imperfect.. I ask for her forgiveness every single day as I believe she must of left thinking mommy didn't love her for not being there when she most needed me.. I feel so hopeless I've heard of many miracle babies whom were able to survive but I guess I didn't deserve such miracle.. I am a hardworking mom whom love her kids so very much and really never went out with friends or family or even alone with my husband because i would feel guilty for leaving them alone as silly as that sounds but its true plus I just loved being with them and enjoyed being around them till this happened now I feel hopeless I feel like a horrible parent and sometimes feel like I won't be able to care for my remaining children because I feel so scared to fail them too.. It's been 4 months and I really don't know how to deal with the trama and pain and guilt..has anyone went through a similar accident and was able to finally forgive yourself? :'( if so how?


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Michelle - posted on 01/01/2013




I would suggest you seek grief counseling to help you. You have gone through an immensely painful and tragic event. i know for me talking always helps and the more i talk the better i feel. I would talk to strangers who happened to ask me how i was. Anyone who would listen i would tell about my daughter's traumatic birth and my need to seek professional help to deal with my postpartum depression and post traumatic stress disorder. But sometimes it's easier to talk to strangers than our loves. Talk to anyone about how you're feeling.

While I have not been through an event equal to the magnitude of yours, I hope it is helpful. I will pray for peace, understanding and support for you and your family. Please work on forgiving yourself, you deserve forgiveness.

Dove - posted on 12/30/2012




I haven't been through this, but I hope I can offer you some support and advice that might mean something.

First of all.... I am SO sorry for your loss! The pain you are feeling right now is something NO mother should ever have to experience.

I would like to suggest you consider going to grief counseling to help you find a way to get through this.

I would also like to suggest that you find the next and nearest CPR class... and take it... And consider sharing your story with others, so that you can, hopefully, save another mother from the heartache you are feeling.

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