What Are My Options!!! He won't WORK so he don't have to pay!!!!

Kimberly - posted on 01/24/2016 ( 2 moms have responded )




Hello ladies! I'm in need of any type of guidance or helpful words. I am the mother of a disabled non verbal 17 yr old daughter who's father has not consistently paid child support and hasn't worked in 2 yrs I feel so he doesn't have to pay support. He work under the table but denies it! What can I do? Does anyone have any suggestions. I allow him to see her every to weeks and in two years he has only given me maybe $300. I am sooo angry, because in the last 10 years he's been taking care of his ex con girlfriends 4 children while she's been in prison....not his kids!!!! HELP!!!!


Jodi - posted on 01/24/2016




First, you need to separate the payment from the relationship your daughter has with him. How much he pays has absolutely NO BEARING on how often he should be able to see his daughter, I just want to put that out there, because you don't use what is an important relationship for your child as punishment for non-payment.

About the payment - there is little you can do. I have had the exact same issue for years. My son's father always earned JUST under the threshhold where he had to pay more than the minimum, so for the last 5 years, I have received $30 a month, That's it. There is absolutely no point being angry. I just got on with it and supported my son myself. Annoying? Yes. But why waste your energy giving him the time of day with your anger? You need to learn to let go of the anger.

One thing I've always told myself is that at the end of the day, he won't really be able to truthfully take pride in the wonderful adult his son has become because he was never truly the parent he should have been. In my heart, I take credit for how he has turned out, and that is my reward for my sacrifices. His contribution was negligible. No anger, just pity.

Dove - posted on 01/24/2016




Does she receive SSI? Does she qualify (if she's not receiving it already)?


View replies by

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms