what should u do when yur child lies to u .. She is in the first gr,


JuLeah - posted on 09/16/2011




Humm, well, first grade ... she is still figuring this all out. Kids this age are still caught up in magical thinking, which is how the unicorn lives in their closet and Santa comes on the 25th.

So, she might not yet be real clear on what you call a lie. And, if she has ever been asked to, or been around adults that do lie - which is all of us, it can be twice as confusing

We ask them to use kind manners when eating dinner at a friends house, even say we like the meal if we don't

We say 'sorry' when we might not actually feel it

We say 'thank you and I love it' for a gift we don't love all that much

BFF asks, "Do you like my new hair cut?" ... you get my point

So, don't be too hard on her.

Point out what you think happened. "Your teacher said she watched you pour ink in the fish tank. You tell me you didn't. I think maybe you want me to think that becuase you don't want me upset with you...."

Not saying your kid killed the class fish, that's just an example


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Sandra - posted on 09/18/2011




thanks for yur help She 'll get something out the refrigertor She said I didn't eat that .. Another thing her mother would say go & clean her room but she said i already cleaned my room.up .. I told my daughter some kids go thru many stages & one is lying...

Amy - posted on 09/16/2011




It's pretty normal for kids to lie to avoid getting in trouble. You don't say what she lied about or how you know she was lieing, but sometimes if you change the way you word the question for example you saw your daughter hit her brother you may ask "did you just hit your brother", she can respond by saying "I didn't hit him", resulting in a lie because you're giving her a chance to deny, but if you said "why did you hit your brother", you may get an explanation, I know it sometimes works with my som who's 5.

[deleted account]

I think lieing at this age is probably pretty common. If you asked my 4yr old if she saw unicons in her garden she would say yes & describe them all.

Depends...what is she lieing about? My girl had a stage that every time she fell or hurt herself she would say, "I have ouchie my daddie hits me.' Oh lord! I would just tell her very calmly the truth of what ever situation, for example it is not nice to say that, you fell off the slide didn't you? And it has pretty much resolved, but she can still be covered in cake & tell me she didn't touch it.

I think lieing at this age is normal to some extent. It would depend on the lie & the situation. i would very calmly correct her to start with.

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