what to do with a 6 year old talking about sex?

Aminatou - posted on 11/19/2009 ( 10 moms have responded )




What should I do? my 6 year old daughter has a classmate who told her the other day "let's talk about sex" and then she described to my daughter how her parents have relations. I am very concerned. Thank in advance for your respond


Natalie - posted on 11/19/2009




I agree! I would explain it in 6 year old terms and tell her how glad you are that she came to you with her questions and comments. I would explain that those types of conversations sometimes can be confusing and she may not always get correct information from her "friends". I would also try to explain that certain topics of conversation should be taken seriously and talked about privately with close family and friends. Never to keep confusing coversations secret!

Theresa - posted on 11/21/2009




the real concern is a 6 year old having explicit knowledge. Teacher should be made aware or at minimum school counsler. Parents may not even be aware that they had someone who saw or heard them. Kids can be very quiet if they are trying to get into bed with parents at night if they have been scared or awakened.

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Yvonne - posted on 12/12/2010




I completely agree with carlyn, why beat arround the bush with your child they should be able to come to you with any question and you be able to answer it honestly, No you do not need to go into major detail with her but dont lie to her either read her the book "where do i come from?" and i would most deffinately bring it up to the teacher so that it is addressed and they can look for signs of abuse if anything is truley going on. kids are curious and always want to know the WHY and HOW. just be honest.

[deleted account]

I agree the teacher should be made aware of the situation as a precaution to look into the matter w/ the parents of the other child & a counselor...maybe there is someting else going on in their household. It's not "normal" for a child this young to know the explicits". At this point, find out exactly how your child is interpreting the information given. Then clarify things as you feel fit for her to understand. Open communication is KEY...you little one should feel comfortable telling you things that go on in her life. Just don't freak out in front of her :) Best wishes...

Carlyn - posted on 11/23/2009




I feel that in today's society, there are many ways a child as young as that could be exposed to the "explicit details" of the act. The child could have walked in on their parents, or, more likely, heard something at school, seen something on television, clicked the wrong internet link, and as a result asked the parents about sex. While some kids are okay with a glossing over "something mommies and daddies do to show they love each other", other kids want the details. As long as it is no more graphic than the information in "Where do I Come From?", I don't think it's a problem. Is it so wrong for kids to know that information? As a teacher, I've seen kids as young as sixth grade pregnant, (yes, we're talking 11-12 years old), and if they can't come to parents then who do they get information from? Their friends? The internet? Television? Of course, once they have that type of information, they can't wait to share it with their peers!

That said, I do think you should either talk to the child's teacher or the parent of the child who brought that information to school. Although small, there is the possiblity that the child learned that information due to abuse, and the situation should most likely be looked into.

Isobel - posted on 11/21/2009




I'm curious why we're assuming that this is a bad kid, or that she must automatically have bad parents. When my children come to me with a question, I always answer it honestly, and I'm sure they don't keep secrets...it's kinda the same as telling your kid Santa isn't real. I'm sure other parents freak out about those kids spreading the truth too.

Chasity - posted on 11/21/2009




Be honest. If she's already hearing it at school, there's really nothing you can do (of course talk to the teacher and even if the principal if you have to and express your concern that this is going on). Or you could home school (I do). Now that the "cat;s out of the bag", Explain the basics to your child (there's no need for graphic details) and then put the conversation to rest. If you make it into a big deal, it will seem that much more interesting, making it that much more irresistible to your child. If you make it seem important, but no big deal, your child should lose interest pretty quickly. Also, there's nothing wrong with getting the initial "talk" out of the way. Yes, you will have to revisit this conversation in the future, but hopefully by then she will be much older.

Aminatou - posted on 11/19/2009




yes we had "a grown up talk" about it, is it necessary to tell their teacher about it or not? and forbid my daughter playing with her because she told me also that she lies sometime and denounce all the time other classmates

Gloria - posted on 11/19/2009




I feel bad about your daughter classmate, that tells me that their parents do everything careless, which is not good for their kids, because they should learn things in life at their own phase. Now to your daughter talk to her with the truth, I like Joanna coment, that is the best way to describe it without going to details.

Joanna - posted on 11/19/2009




just explain it in a very simple but true way - she's heard about it so it's not good to lie or skirt the issue. Just say sex is something that mommies and daddies do to show they love each other... something along those lines.

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