what to do with a non cooperative ex?

Jessica - posted on 08/16/2011 ( 1 mom has responded )




So....I need some advice regarding my husbands ex whom he has a 22 month old daughter with. From the time she found out she was pregnant she stopped all communication with him. She changed her phone number and eventually stopped responding to his emails. When she would respond, she would only beg him to just " walk away ". Refusing to walk away from his daughter, around the time of her last known due date, my husband took her to court to be present at the birth of his daughter, establish parental rights, and visitation. In court he found out that baby was already born and two weeks old. Also the mom admitted to not knowing who the father was. Ever since then it has been an uphill battle. She refuses to communicate effectively and always plays the victim. She refuses to communicate with me and hates the fact that I take care of Addy. She hates the fact that I love that precious little girl as if she were my own. She hates the fact that Addy reaches for me when its time for her to go back with her mom. She has stated that I need to know my "boundaries" and that I need to " stop parenting HER daughter". She has also stated numerous times that Addy will not call me mom. Neither my husband nor I have ever forced or told Addy to call me mommy in fact she has just started that on her own. My husband tells her Jessie. I don't care if she calls me mom or not I feel she is too young to understand the circumstances and scolding her for calling me mommy is uncalled for. I'm not trying to replace anybody as Addys mother. But I feel it is absolutely ludicrous for her to state that I need not parent her daughter. She lives in my house so therefore she will he patented by me. Am I supposed to let her run around wild? The biggest issue for me right now is communication. She refuses to talk to me. I feel it is important for us to have a good relationship. I'm not asking to be her best friend. I just want to be treated with respect and to be able to communicate with her. I have always been nice to her and shown her respect but all I get in return is negativity and bitterness.I'm tired of being nice only to get walked all over. I don't like the lies and the awkwardness and the feeling that she's always up to something. Is there anything else I can do???? Or should do???


Erica - posted on 08/17/2011




You shouldnt communicate with your DH's ex. Thats his business he simply slept with her not you. I would stay out of it as much as possible. Nobody needs that extra person to upset anyone.

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