What to say to my kids....when their dad doesn't call

Brandee - posted on 12/18/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )




I recently made the decision to end my relationship with my children's father. He was a good dad while here. i felt I was in the relationship for the wrong reasons. I know I stayed with him for the kids and I knew i needed to break that off. Well When him and I first met he and his ex (the mother of his other child) were constantly fighting over the child. I now know what she went thru. I always felt he didn't make that much effort in seeing his other son. Now that I am a single mom to his other 2 children, (its been about a month) I think he has only called the kids maybe 3 or 4 times, I am frustrated. I am not like most moms. I wont go after him for child support (i have my reasons) i just want him to make attempts to see his kids or to talk to them. We live an hour away from each other now and I understand its hard. I just don't know what to tell the almost 5 year old and the almost 2 year old when they say they miss their dad. I give them both tons of love and attention. I start feeling anger that here i am doing it all alone...That he will just not be as active as I'd hoped for in the kids' life. I just don't want my kids to not feel the love


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Amy - posted on 12/18/2013




If you want him to be in your children's lives then set up visitation through the court. When you set up visitation you can establish things like when the children can call him or he can call the kids, and how often he can see the kids. Support and visitiation are two different things so you can set up visitation without filing for support.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 12/18/2013




Well, if you won't take him to court to get court orders for support and visitation, you can't do much to force him to contact you.

You had to have known you would struggle getting him to continue contact, from your experience with his ex, so I don't understand why that wouldn't have been one of the first things you addressed with your attorney when starting the paperwork to end the marriage.

Yes, he SHOULD do this. But you've already seen from past experience that he WON'T, so your only avenue now is to have court ordered time with the kids. Then, when he doesn't comply, at least he can be held in contempt of court and fined...perhaps his wallet will encourage him to contact the kids.

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