When should your kids move out on there own.

Reggy - posted on 01/12/2011 ( 19 moms have responded )




My oldest step-sister has a son that is 32 and still lives at home with her. There is notting wrong with him and he makes good money and she does too. My mom and sister see nothing wrong with it because he works all the time and is not married. In the last 15 years that I have known him I think we talked once. I think that it is wrong to be living with with your mother at that age unless there is money or health problem. I know its not it my life but what do you think.


JuLeah - posted on 01/13/2011




In many cultures aorund the world, kids never move out. They marry and move their (wife/husband) in with them and great grandparents, grandparents, parents, uncles, aunts, sibs .... all live together under one roof that keep expanding. I think that is kind of neat.

[deleted account]

If he's capable of surviving on his own (since he has a good job) I see nothing wrong w/ having a roommate... even if it is his mother.

Now, if he were being a lazy leech I would feel differently.


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Rose - posted on 01/16/2011




lol!! I am the complete opposite....I want my kids to stay in my house until they go away to college or marry, I may change my mind once they turn into teenagers! But I'm already mentally re-designing my 2nd floor and basement so they will one day have their own apt., although they will technicallystill be in my house :)

Kathy - posted on 01/15/2011




First they have to be atleast 17 and have their high school diploma. Then they are free of me. I will let them stay if they go to college-but there will be rules and rent. No college-no room. If they and their families fall on hard times, I will be here for them, BUT I will not be taken advantage of and there will NOT be no living in my home at 30-something. Nope, won't happen. Love them but no.

[deleted account]

Im gonna have to side with you. I mean i dont kno the whole story so this is just me making a quick assessment. I think a man that old with money should definitely be living on his own. Has he never ever lived along?? Thats just weird hello when are you gonna cut the umbilical chord? haha. It doesnt matter if he is not married or anything he needs to be independent you really think he is gonna get a wife still living at his moms? yea right that would be a big turn off to me. That means he cant make it on his own and i wouldnt want that kind of guy moving in with me cuz what am i gonna have to step in and be his new mom?? uh no. that is pretty weird. I have a cousin he is almost thirty and yes has a good job and everything and still lives at home with his mom! he says its cuz he is helping them out but i dont believe him. He is lazy goes out all the time and expects his mom to clean up after him and everything!! I dont kno pretty pathetic to me

Erin - posted on 01/15/2011




I have an uncle that lived at home with my grandma until he was well into his 30's. Even then, when he got married, he moved just across the street. My grandma did have poor health due to diabetes, but I think it was good company for her as well. Even when he moved across the street, my uncle made sure to stop in once or twice a day to check on her. He worked full time and was able to take care of himself even before marriage. If neither of the parties has a problem, then it should not be anyone else's concern really.

[deleted account]

I think that it really depends on the family and culture. in some cultures (like indian) it is pretty much expected that you live at home until you are married, regardless your income. i personally wouldn't like it because I feel like that's too old, especially if they are making a decent income.

Amanda - posted on 01/15/2011




Being that I am 33 and my husband is 27, and for the last two years we have had to move back in with his parents, I can't really make any judgments! :)

Bonnie - posted on 01/15/2011




As long as he is helping out around the house and money wise, I don't see a problem with it.

Rose - posted on 01/15/2011




I agree, if he is working and not a leech, then it makes sense to live at home. I moved out while I was in college and then moved back home afterwards to work/save money. My husband never moved out of his parent's house until we got married, then we moved into our own apartment. He also did not know how to clean or pick up after himself, but he learned pretty quickly how to wash laundry, vacum, wash dishes and now the swiffer is his best friend! Now that he knows how to clean, we are working on his cooking :)-

Kelina - posted on 01/13/2011




lol jennifer glad to know i'm not alone. Granted i got to my hubby long before he hit 28 but it was the same thing-he never learned to pick up after himself, drives me nuts sometimes. But I agree with teresa. If he weren't working it ould be something else altogether, but this way he's probably able to put a lot of money away so if he ever does get married or want a place of his own he won't have to worry about getting a mortgage or paying for a wedding.

Jocelyn - posted on 01/13/2011




As long as he's not a lazy ass bumming a free ride, then I don't see a problem with it. It's just like having a roommate.

Louise - posted on 01/13/2011




I think that if your step sister has a problem with it then she should say so and ask him to leave. But I suspect that she is glad of the company and he is very comfortable being at home. Good luck to them they are probably company for each other. Not every man wants a bachelor pad.

Jennifer - posted on 01/13/2011




My husband was kind of like that. He had always had a job from the time he was 16, and he helped with bills and everything. He was 28, and his father had passed away about 4 years before I met him, so his mom was happy to have someone there with her. He figured there was no reason to move, because he could help with bills and mowing and other things that needed fixed. Plus, it saved a bunch of money from him not having to pay for his own place. The only thing that kinda stunk for me was that his mom would always clean up after him, so he never really learned to pick up after himself. Other than that one thing, he did everything he would have, had he been living alone. I never saw a problem with it and his mom is such a wonderful person, that I wouldn't mind living with her. LOL

Laura - posted on 01/13/2011




If the living arrangements are working for them then it's no one's business. It is unconvential to be sure but not "wrong". This is a choice that these people have made and it's working for them. I can only assume that the combined finances are used in paying for household items and upkeep so there shouldn't be a problem there. If it ain't broke, don't fix it...as my dad always says...

Tracy - posted on 01/12/2011




Personally, I hope my kids are well employed and out of my house by the time they're 32. But, if it's working for them, and he's helping around the house/financially, then whatever.

Amber - posted on 01/12/2011




I agree with Teresa. I would be more against it if he didn't work and was living there being supported. If he's working all the time, maybe he doesn't feel that he has the time to deal with the upkeep of his own place. And what's the real point of them both having seperate residences and paying twice the money?
I wouldn't want to live like that, but I don't see anything wrong with it. It seems practical.

Sherri - posted on 01/12/2011




Each to their own. If it works for their family then it is nobody else's business. I know a family where the brother and sister never married both still live at home with now just their mother and they are in their late 40's and early 50's. However, it really was a blessing as the parents aged their was always someone there to take care of them. Oh and the brother has an 18yr old daughter that lives there as well.

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