Balancing the load

Stephanie - posted on 10/28/2008 ( 1 mom has responded )




My husband was always one to help around the house and he has taken a job that totally wears him out. He works from 7 to 7 six days a week. This leaves everything on me. I take him to work each morning (one car) get home, dress our daughter, let the dog out, take her to daycare across town and get to work 15 minutes late everyday. My evenings are just as crazy...I leave work 30 minutes early, pick up my daughter at daycare, get home at 5:15, let the dog out, feed Ella, start dinner (?), bathe Ella and leave to pick up my husband at 6:55 (I meet him at a drop spot at 7:10). Get home finish dinner while my husband spends a few moments with our daughter before ( I ) put our daughter to bed, eat dinner and hope the dish fairy comes during the night. I am so stressed out. I can't stand having a dirty house. I am doing it all. I've asked him to be responsible for brushing her teeth and he won't even do that. How do I not loose my mind and not hold resentment towards my husband?


Jennifer - posted on 10/28/2008




I'm in a sort of similar situation. My husband had a 2 hour commute. He leaves the house at 6:15am and doesn't get home until 7:45pm. We both used to work from home and I got spoiled. One of us would do the daycare drop and the other would do the pick up. While I cooked dinner, he would take care of our son. When I was pregnant with the 2nd, he got this new job and it's been downhill from there. I still work at home, but I really work. I do try to do laundry or dishes but I get really busy and sometimes can't. I also end up working at night a lot because of it. When my husband gets home, he gives the kids a bath and we put them to bed and THEN he eats dinner. So basically our time together is pretty much gone and we're BOTH exhausted. The kids don't get the best of us and it really sucks. What we've been trying to do is make the most of our weekends. It's hard with all of the bday parties, etc but we're getting there. As for your husband, you need to talk to him before you really start to resent him. Explain that you work hard, too, and that little things like brushing your daughter's teeth would mean SO much because it's one less thing that you have to do. List the things that you do so that he has something concrete to work with. I think sometimes our spouses don't realize exactly how much we do to keep things going.

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