Does anybody else think they're just not cut out to be a SAHM?

Margaret - posted on 11/27/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )




Hey everyone!

I'm brand new here, and was a career woman for quite a while even after I had my 3 girls ages 5, 3, and 19 mos, but I recently quit my horrible job due to it being horrible and stressful and making me sick. I've been a SAHM for a little over 2 mos and I really miss being at work. I used to think that I really wanted to stay at home w/ my kids, but I just hate it. I miss talking to adults, the intellectual stimulation, the paycheck, not changing dirty diapers, and not listening to whining and screaming all day long. Society tries to make women think they MUST stay home w/ their kids or there's something wrong w/ them. Is it wrong that I just can't stand it and can't wait to go back to work?


Marian - posted on 11/28/2012




Being a stay at home Mom is one of the hardest job that exists. It has the worst pay scale, no sick leave, no vacation, you don't even get a break to go to the bathroom. And as women we are expected to love and cherish this role, because society says we should. But what no one talks about is that being a stay at home Mom isn't for everyone. Not everyone likes wiping bottoms and noses all day. Not every woman dreams of doing piles of laundry over and over and over again. And it's okay if the day to day challenges of being a stay at home Mom doesn't do it for you. That's the beauty of being a Mom in our current generation. We don't have to be Mrs. Clever. We can hire a Mrs. Doubtfire and be Mrs. Bring Home the Bacon! Do what makes you happy because in the end it will make your family happy.

Amy - posted on 11/27/2012




No there is nothing wrong with not wanting to be home all the time. I love my kids dearly but I still need a break once in awhile, I wish I didn't have to work full-time because I think part-time work would be the best of both worlds. If your looking for adult interaction look for playgroups on, go to the library for story hour, and if you have extra money try getting the older ones involved in an activity like dance or gymnastics.


View replies by

Heather - posted on 12/04/2012




there are loads of centre about where mums get together and chat whilst kids play have a look on the internet we have the sure start near us we go three times a week we do baby yoga and message tiny tiggers which is great fun there is coffee mornings held there jumble sales once a month they hold there where you can swap toys and clothes over for things they need or want i am sure there will be some thing similar near you

[deleted account]

Not at all! I completely understand what you mean and can relate. As much as I love my children - they are exhausting! I need time away from them to recharge and be a better more patient and loving mother to them. Working outside the home is actually a break and easier than being with my kids 24-7. Part time work outside the home is definitely the best of both worlds. Good luck!

Susan - posted on 12/02/2012




I think Marian said it perfectly. You have to do what makes you happy. If you aren't happy, you aren't going to make your family happy. My mom was a SAHM and like you, I thought that's what moms do and what I wanted to do. Financially we couldn't afford it, but during my maternity leave with my first, I quickly realized I wasn't cut out for that anyway. I also needed to get out of the house and feel like I accomplished something. I now work four days and stay home with the kids on Fridays. I will say that Fridays are my most difficult day of the week and often by 8am I wish I could go to work. SAHM is absolutely harder than any job I could do outside my home and I give a ton of credit to women that can do it. I think some women are meant for that and some aren't, and I know I'm not.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms