having a hard time leaving my baby

Kamonya - posted on 09/15/2009 ( 8 moms have responded )

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Every morning it takes me a very long time to be able to leave the house as I feel scared and guilty going to work and leaving my 4 month old. Will he understand or does he miss me does he feel neglected. Anyone feel like this and what helps to go through the day?

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Karen - posted on 09/18/2009

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Quoting Kamonya:

having a hard time leaving my baby

Every morning it takes me a very long time to be able to leave the house as I feel scared and guilty going to work and leaving my 4 month old. Will he understand or does he miss me does he feel neglected. Anyone feel like this and what helps to go through the day?


I found that this feeling is hard to shake and lasts for years.  I had to just remind myself everyday that I was doing what I needed to do to provide housing, medical care and a future to my child.  As he grows just keep telling him you love him and can't wait to see him at the end of the day to hear about his day.  My kids are 9 and 12 and I still do this.  I would prefer to be home everyday when they come home from school, but we have to do what is necessary to provide for them.  He will completely understand and still love you.

Hayun - posted on 09/18/2009

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This morning was really hard for me too! My babies started to cry since 6 AM, and I got scared to take them to the daycare when they are at their worst condition.
I hope they have good day today. I am sure all the babies know how to adjust.

September - posted on 09/16/2009

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I felt the same way! I wondered if he missed me and felt bad if so. I quickly realized that the reason I had to leave was to be able to support him in the way that he needs to be supported. I know that it's not easy leaving every morning but I'm sure as he gets older he will understand why Mommy has to go to work. I don't think that your child feels neglected he may miss you a bit but I'm sure that he is fine :) Hang in there!

User - posted on 09/16/2009

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hang in there, it does get easier. i have done it three times now and it was tough each time.

when you are with the little one, enjoy the time. keep telling yourself that it's quality and not quantity. that does help me a bit.....

Cristina - posted on 09/15/2009

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My son has been cared for by others (mother-in-law, parents, daycare) since he was an infant. We tell him that Mommy has to work (because she got old-- dad's idea) so Baby can have his clothes, toys, house, etc, and tell him what I do everyday. He goes to "school" to learn, meet friends, play, and have fun while we can't. He's now 3yo, chatty, fairly independent, curious, strong, has his mommy time and his need-mommy time, and I don't think he's any worse for wear. Try to be positive about leaving him, tell him to have fun, and take pictures of him to work with you. Call in when you miss him, take a deep breath, talk to other mothers at work, and be happy to go home every day. Not all mom's are happy to see their children at 5pm!!

Michelle - posted on 09/15/2009

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I cried every single day when I went back to work, so I understand how you feel. It is VERY difficult. Who watches him while you are at work? I think the most important thing is to be comfortable with who watches him during the day. If it is a loving person, he will not feel neglected. Something I did (this may not be an option for you) was change my work schedule so that I was able to work from home two days per week. My son still needed to go to day care, but I was able to pick him up earlier and spend some time with him towards the end of the day. That helped a lot. Good luck!

Stephanie - posted on 09/15/2009

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It's always hard to leave the 1 you love so much. If you think about it you love him so much you wouldnt put him in harms way he feels that love.

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