HELP!!! My daughter cries when I leave for work!!! What should I do?

Sabrina - posted on 05/27/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )




Every night when I get ready for bed I tell my daughter "Give me a kiss and a hug because I'm going to sleep now." Her reply "Why you gota go to sleep for?" Me: "Because mommy has to get up early in the morning and go to work." Her: "Why? (crying while talking) I don't want you to go to work. I want you to stay here with me. Please don't go to work mommy please!" What should I do? It's not only at night when I'm getting ready for bed, it's in the mornings too. If she's awake when I leave she throws a fit. I feel bad for leaving because it breaks my heart but I have to work. Any suggestions?


Michelle - posted on 05/27/2012




She is playing on your guilt and it is working you need to tell her that you are going to bed because mommies need to sleep to or mommies will be cranky. Don't talk about work, then in the morning have the same routine every day this way they are not obsessing about you going to work all night long. I would hazard a guess that she doesn't cry for long after you leave just long enough to make you feel really bad. Give a quick hug and kiss say good bye and out the door you go.


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Nikki - posted on 05/28/2012




My son went through a faze when he would cry when I took him and his infant brother to sitter I'm still unsure if it was true separation anxiety or if the sitter was not treating them good. I had to change sitter in the middle of this period and the tantrums stopped. Not trying to scare you just be sure that she isn't telling you something through her desire for you to not go to work. But if you are sure that she is well cared for while you're at work then only time will solve the problem. Stay with the same routine and try not to talk about leaving prior as much it only prolongs the separation anxiety symptoms.

Amy - posted on 05/27/2012




My daughter is only two and the only time she wants me is when I'm leaving for work, and once I'm out of sight she is right back to being daddy's girl. I agree with Michelle at night don't focus on going to sleep because you have to get up and go to work, say something along the lines of "well everyone needs a good night sleep or else they get very cranky". In the morning follow the same routines and make the good byes the same every day that way she knows what to expect and it won't turn into a long drawn out ordeal.

Nicky - posted on 05/27/2012




I have this same problem with my 4 yr old boy. He used to be fine when I went to work he would give me a hug and a kiss and say "have a good day ill see you later mommy". now I go through the same exact thing as you. At bedtime he asks why im going to bed and I tell him because I have to work in the morning and he says "why mommy.. I want you to stay with me" and I say because I need to make money so we can go do fun things. If he is sleeping in the morning I go in and kiss his head before I leave but, If he is awake before I go I give him a hug and kiss and say goodbye and he says "mommy im gonna cry when you leave" I tell him I will be back I always come back. He begs me to stay saying "please stay mommy" it makes me so sad that I just have to leave with him like this. Its not just me he does this with ..he does this to my boyfriend also. And when I get home from work he does this whole thing to his babysitter(his nana) he tells her the same thing that he doesnt want her to go. Sometimes he goes as far as trying to chase her car as she drives away. Its very heartbreaking. I wish I new how to make it end.. I know exactley what your going through.

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