How do you cope with a child that likes to live on the streets.

Val - posted on 09/24/2009 ( 10 moms have responded )

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I've had 4 kids and rearing up two step kids not easy..I have a 14yr old that hates staying home likes going to his mates and getting into trouble with the law..Please give us some idea to keep him home..

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I am not going to try and tell you what to do, I am sure you have tried everything you can think of. I have teenagers but am fortunate not to be in this position, though my brother is. Please be there for your whenever you need to and thats all you can do. Be patient and remind them, often, that you love them, no matter what.

Lisa - posted on 09/27/2009

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It sounds like to me that he is doing this to get attention. if i was u i would sit him down and just talk no arguements and no pressure and if you can just try and spend some time alone with him each week just u and him.

hope this works for you.

Michelle - posted on 09/27/2009

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I went through the same thing with my 23 year old, he still lives from place to place no real roots yet. It is frustrating and you beat your self up. I now have a 8 year old and what I'm doing differnt is keeping him busy in sports, BB, Bowling, Golf, he goes to the boys and girls club after school and it's a safe environment with supervised activities. we have dinner together each night and discuss his day, I realize 8 and 14 are worlds aprat already, But your 14 year may go for getting into a bowling league or other sport.And I highly recomend not letting him hang out with people older or at homes where parents are absent.

Linda - posted on 09/27/2009

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You give it over to God. I have five of them that wanted to do everything under the sun at a very early age. Once I stop worrying so much and started praying more. I noticed the changed. You must understand no matter how well you raised them; which is the most hurting part. There is that percent of children just choose to do what they want. I am a witness. Those are the ones you have to turn over to God. He is the only one that can changed them. A quick testimony for you. I had to put my kids out my house before age of 18. Now they all have their own, working, going to college, and staying out of trouble and back in church. On my behalf it took much praying and faith.

Val - posted on 09/27/2009

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You know what the hardest thing is that i'm a step mom for the first time to two boys 14 and a 10 year olds. I'm there to support them both but they don't want it what can i do? I think i try to hard..

Val - posted on 09/27/2009

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Thank you for your comment..You know wat males are like very stubborn we let him stay out there and he didn't come home for 3wks..He needed a shower and a feed had a bad cold..Once he got better he went again now he is under social welfare care..Sad i know but thats what he wants..not what we want though..

Cailie - posted on 09/25/2009

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i was one of those kids and i think that the one thing that strightened mw out was my dad let me live that life for a while. he completley let me be. it was very scary and i was in a holding cell for one night and later was in the fasture holding (its a place that you go before you are placed) i am not saying let him go but this is what finally did it for me. i am now 25 married one child so far, graduated high school and cut hair for a living own two cars and a house. i cant say that every child can be cured some just don't see the path on the other side. but maaybe a few rough nights might work. GOOD LUCK!!!!

Jenniffer - posted on 09/25/2009

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My kids are younger also but I was a teen and I have been helpping with younge mom I took care of her baby for a year and 1/2 she now lives in a group house that has people there to be the eyes and ears. I am not sure if you are at the point to do that but the other kids are going to learn from this one. Tough love its hard but maybe what you should do??? Again mine are little right now so I cant even say what i would do. Sorry for whta you are going through and I hope what ever you do works and the rest of the kids learn by watching why not to do what this one is doing.

Sarah - posted on 09/25/2009

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I don't have teenagers either, but since you asked for advice...I agree with Alison, kids need boundries. If he is getting in trouble with with law there should be consequences, ground him from going anywhere. If he sneaks away take away his privilages like video games, computer time, tv time. If he likes new things (shoes, clothes, etc.) buy used or wal-mart brand. Let him know that this is what will happen. Stick with it and BE CONSISTANT! He will probably try to get out of this by being so annoying that you reduce his sentance or give in, but don't!

Be in contact with his mates parents as well, make sure you are on the same page about what you expect from the kids as well as eachother. If they get into trouble and they are all grounded at once then the chances of him sneaking out decrease. Does he get into trouble right after school before you get home from work? Get him involved with the YMCA or other afterschool program to keep him busy and occupied. Hope that helps.

Alison - posted on 09/25/2009

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I do not yet have teenagers, so I am no expert, but I firmly believe that teenagers need boundaries enforced with consequences. My colleague learned a lot from Dr. Phil's book (I think it is called Family First). It must be so challenging to meet the needs of all of those kids. The best of luck to you!

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