How do you get your 12 year old to agree to a haircut without fighting you?

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Jennifer - posted on 09/11/2009

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It is hair......In my opinion there are so many bigger issues to tackle with our kids. Let them have hair.....

Amber - posted on 09/10/2009

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My son is 12 too. I pretty much tell him he can have his hair long in the summer time but once school starts he needs to get it cut. I let him choose the hair style with it reason. That seems to work out o.k.

Mary Kay - posted on 09/05/2009

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My husband and son fought over his long hair for two years.......I didn't care if he had long hair or short, colored or a mohawk. I figure it's his one way of showing some individual control.



Now he's in high school and he asks to get his hair cut every month or so!! He decided his hair was too hot while playing sports, so he keeps it really short.



I'd let him wear his hair any way he wants. It's not worth the power struggle in my book.



If you are really invested in his haircut.....perhaps you could make a deal with him...a break on his chores, additional allowance, something so it feels like a win-win situation. You get to look at shorter hair and he gets something that means something to him.



Good luck.

Jennifer - posted on 09/04/2009

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I can understand your frustration about your sons hair but try to remember when you were 12. He does not want to look differently from his friends. As long as his hair is within the acceptable limits to meet school dress code then I believe that he should be okay. He does need to be able to be an individual and should be allowed to wear his hair in a manner that he likes. Just remember it is only a phase and he will grow out of it.

Amy - posted on 09/02/2009

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I made a deal with him. He can keep the hair as long as he receives 85% or higher on all tests at school. If he comes home with an 84% or below, he has to get it cut any normal style short enough for me to see his eyes. Well, he had to get it cut Sunday after Church, he got a 78% on a test. His hair is still a bit longer than I like, but I can see his beautiful eyes again. I told him if I have to deal with the hair, he has to get good grades.

Julia - posted on 09/02/2009

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The best advice I can offer is choose your battles wisely. I agree with Tricia. Is this really something to argue with your son over? Unless it is some sort of school dress code issue or something like that, I say let it go. There will be plenty of other things that warrant an argument/fight, but not this.

Suzan - posted on 09/02/2009

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He's 12 - he may be trying to test the boundaries but you still make the rules. Give him choice in the style but explain that he doesn't have an option about getting the cut.

Tricia - posted on 09/02/2009

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I am sure he is trying to test his boundaries but at 12 let him make the decision. As long as he is doing good in school and home, why does it matter if his hair is cut or not. My son has always gotten to make the choice with his hair as long as it is clean and brushed. Remember it is just hair, and you will have bigger fits coming.

Pinky - posted on 09/01/2009

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Let him pick the style!
on the understanding that its school friendly ie: no Mohawks or bright pink. Also make sure that he understand he has to put effort into styling it EVERY day, as its not acceptable to look untidy. If he agrees to this then you have to bite the bullet and follow through even if its a style that you don't like. This is a great opportunity for him to accept responsiblitiy for himself.
This is what I did with my eldest and so far so good! Hope it helps!

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