How do you make friends after having children?

Kimberly - posted on 05/28/2011 ( 5 moms have responded )




I moved to another city for work and found out I was pregnant shortly thereafter. I was able to still see my old friends while I was still pregnant (I only moved about 20 miles away), but now that my son is here, I hardly see anyone anymore unless I make the effort. Now I feel friendless and don't know how or where to connect with girls/moms my age as I work full time and hardly ever get out. Any suggestions?


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Farah - posted on 03/21/2018




i feel like im in the same boat currently. So desperately need a friend i could just talk to without feeling judged. you a go-to person...sigh! why is it so hard?!

Cathy - posted on 05/31/2011




I'm feeling the same way. When I met my DH we lived in different cities. I eventually moved in with him where he lives and got married. So I was a single, living in Los Angeles, had tons of friends and having the time of my life. Then I moved 30 miles away, the culture is different and I would say, the people aren't as friendly. My DH is happpy here where all his friends and family are, but all my friends have disappeared and I haven't been able to make any real friends. My DH's friends' wives don't like me since I am an "outsider", I've known them for about 10 years now and they still don't talk to me. DH thinks I am being hard on his friends and non-sociable but it's hard to hang out with people who are hell-bent on not being friends. DH will go and disappear with the guys and the wives will go and disappear into another room and I am left sitting there by myself feeling like an idiot! DH doesn't get it coz it never happens to him--coz I don't have any more friends.

I work full time but work has begun to take up so much of my time and has become so demanding now that I feel that I am not available for my kids (5yo and 3yo) anymore. I really want to stay home for my kids now and we are working on it but at the same time I am really scared of what my life is going to end up being, with no friends at all, being home all day. At least at work, I get to interact with other adults. I don't think age is an issue, at work, you interact and make friends with people of all ages.

Christine - posted on 05/29/2011




My children are now 3 & 4, and let's just say all the friends I had disappeared, and have yet to make new ones. I moved back to my old town, where all my friends live and still don't see anyone.

I do interact with some of the Moms at my son's school, but a lot of them are in their own little clicks, and not too liking of me. The Hubby says it's cause I work from home and it annoys them, but I've just learned to not even try.

I've turned to my Mom a lot as my support system and she has become my bestest friend. No matter what I know she's there for me, and can tolerate my children! Over the years I've learned FRIENDS SUCK! Family is the best.

Amy - posted on 05/29/2011




There is a website where you can see if there are any playgroups in your area, maybe some that have weekend hours. Check your local library and see if they have a story time that falls into your schedule. Barnes and Noble near us has a Saturday morning story hour so you could check with them and take you little one and maybe meet some other moms. Do you work with anyone that has kids, try and set some playdates on the weekends with them. As your child gets older it does get easier to meet other moms, now that the weather is getting nice you can go to your local plaground and try to connect with some moms with kids your own age.
If you're looking to get out on your own hire a sitter and drive the 20 miles to meet your friends for dinner! I know I would love if my friends were only 20 miles away, I try to set something up with my friends every other month (the childless ones) and drive the 60 miles to see them. You could also have a picnic/barbque and get all your friends and family together at your house! Good luck.

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