How to get them sleep by themselves?

Neira - posted on 07/29/2009 ( 6 moms have responded )

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My son is 14 months old, and since he was born never slept through all night. No need to mention how it is exhausting, considering I'm back to work two months ago. He's breastfeeding (now twice or three times a day), 3 months ago I started with formula once during the night, in case hunger wakes him up. After he finish a bottle (or half) he's back to sleep. But after 2 hours, approximately, he starts to cry and want me to put him to breastfeed and sleep at the same time. I think it's my fault, because I thougt im so, during the first month lactation troubles I let him breastfeed day and night, just to keep and increase milk production. He partialy sleeps in his bed and with us, after I get bore to be awake every hour.

Do I have to wait he's grown up or there is no-cry way to teach him to sleep by himself? I'm aware this is very common and so individual problem, but there is got to be way to make it easiest for me.

Thx,

I go to sleep now (in may office)

6 Comments

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Sandra - posted on 07/31/2009

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Jedino što ti mogu reći izdrži, a proći će za par godina. Sretno i drži se.

Neira - posted on 07/31/2009

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O mamma mia, sta cu sada? :)

Stvar je u tome da se navikao na spavanje u kombinaciji sa dojenjem, sto je jaaaaako tesko. Sad to nije prisutno u tolikoj mjeri, kao ranije dok nije jeo toliko krute hrane. Tada sam ustajala slomljena. Sad je lakse, ali se budi svako malo itrazi da ga ja uljuljam u san opet. Ima varijacija na temu, ali urnek ponasanja nocu je manje vise isti. Misaona imenica je prespavati noc. Uporna nisam nikad bila po tom pitanju, priznajem. On je istrajniji od mene, samo sam ga jednom pustila da place, ne znam ni sama koliko je trajalo, ali je bilo duuugooo ( bila sam vrlo ljuta) i opet sam ga podigla i nastavila po starom.

Uspavati se sam, tesko da ce nauciti. Kad nije pospan, legne na jastuk, i ljulja glavicu lijevo-desno i smije se :), onda ustaje.

Nocu kad se probudi zmiri i place, a odmah se podize da stoji ili kleci na koljenima, ako je ogradica krevetica spustena. Pokusam li ga polegnuti, otima se i na kraju ga moram podici, ljuljati, dojiti/flasica, dok ponovno ne zaspi. Samo u pocetnim satima sna, dok je jos umoran, moguce ga je uljuljuljuskati u kreveticu dok lezi.

Danju je jako aktivan, non stop se vrti tamo-vamo i nije mi jasno kako se stigne buditi, a ne odmarati.

Hvala za savjet, lakse je kad znas da nisi sam na svijetu sa istim problemom :)

Nesto cu morati pokusati, ne popustati inace cu postati frustrirana mama kojoj sve smeta. Manjak sna i umor to vrlo lako mogu napraviti od mene.



Pozdrav!

Sandra - posted on 07/31/2009

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Draga Neira ja imam dvostruko iskustvo, prvi sin bio kao i tvoj spavao snama do svoje 4. god. budio se svaka 2-4 sata ja ludila ništa nije pomagalo,prvo sam mislila to je zbog grčeva, rodio se s malom kilažom pa je češće sisao po malo no kasnije mu je to postala navika pa i kad je počeo jesti normalno (otprilike u toj dobi kao tvoj sin sada). Znači čitajući tvoj post vidjela sam sebe i svoje muke, mislila sam da ću izluditi jer se gotovo 4 godine nisam pošteno naspavala. Kad smo ga poslali u drugu sobu u njegov krevet u početku je bilo problema, dolazio u sobu, plakao i sl. ali smo bili uporni i svaki put ga umirujuće vraćali u njegov krevet. Bila bih malo s njim i onda otišla spavati. to je trajalo par dana i sad je sve u redu.Drugo dijete curica sada 3 godine od početka spava sama u svom krevetiću. S njom nisam htjela napraviti istu pogrešku iako mi je bilo teško svaki put poslije dojenja stavljati je u krevetić i ponovo dizati dva tri puta u noći bila sam uporna nisam dala da spava s nama u krevetu i sad nemam problema. Nije stvar u dojenju, ne više, on je dovoljno velik da može izdržati cijelu noć bez mlijeka (iz prsa ili zamjensko svejedno)

i smo mame popustljive, a iskreno meni je bilo lakše pustiti ga s nama nego se svako malo dizati pogotovo kad sam počela raditi. Što god radila slijedi svoj instinkt. Pokušaj ga ostaviti da plače, ti najbolje znaš kakav je njegov plač, jel to zbog gladi ili samo zeza i traži pažnju.Ali nikad dulje od 5 min. Mora naučiti uspavati se sam a ne na prsima. Ne znam, što je stariji sve je teže ja sa svojim nisam uspjela dok mu nisam mogla objasniti ... Dude, omilene igračke krpice sve što mu može pomoći da se osjeća sigurno i da se umiri. Javi se opet možda ti mogu pomoći još nekako.

Neira - posted on 07/30/2009

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Patience...ehhh....know that, but it very hard for me, I can't hear him cry.

Brianna: He already eats quite well during the day, so breastmilk/formula, hunger doesn't have to do anything with his sleep.

I red a lot about all that, but sometimes I'm so tired keep putting him into his bed and leave it next to me, in our bed. Last night he slept alone about 4 hours without waking up, breastfed around 2:00 AM, wake up again in 3:00 AM, ate a formula, then wake up again around 5:00 AM, and I took him in bed with me and housband...he sleeps and breastfeed until 6:30-7:00 AM. I colud say it's one average or better night. Sometimes is much worst.

During a day, he sleeps twice , about 1,5-2:00 hours/each.

My mum said I had similar behaviour when I was a baby. Sooooo....it's payback time :)

Even today, a little noise can wake me up., instantly. That always bothered me.

English is not my mother tounge, as you can see...so it's very hard for me to explain all details.

Anyway, lucky Brianna, 7 or 8 straight hours is quite a sleep. I hope I'll have it before his 18-th birthday, abd. :)

Thx

Brianna - posted on 07/29/2009

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First off: don't start blaming yourself!! I think breastfeeding moms have more guilt because of the strong connection & bond. Breastmilk digests much quicker than formula & breastfed babies are truly hungry more often than bottle fed babies. Have you talked to your pediatrician about feeding him some cereal before bedtime? My son is almost 4 months old and he still nurses every 2-3 hours. In the past month, he finally started sleeping longer...sometimes 7 or 8 straight hours! Does your son sleep in his own bassinet or crib? Or does he sleep with you? I never let my son sleep with me because I know many moms who did & it was very difficult break that habit. But, I can relate: for the first 5 weeks of his life, my son wanted to be held through the night! He hated his bassinet and would sleep in his crib no longer than an hour at a time! Here's how I broke him: I put him down to sleep & when he inevitably woke up crying I picked him up, rocked him back to sleep, then put him back down. It was painstakingly exhausting...but he eventually learned to sleep on his own. There is a book called "The No-Cry Sleep Solution" that may help you. Have you also tried warm baths, massages, lullabies, reading? Whatever you try, be consistent. Good Luck :)

Corrine - posted on 07/29/2009

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Unfortunately, you have to have the patience, be consistent, and the will power not to cave when they start crying. It usually takes about 3 nights but you can get them to sleep in their own bed.

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