I start work again on Monday and am a mess! Any suggestions?

Amy - posted on 01/28/2009 ( 15 moms have responded )

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I go back on Monday and am truly dreading it. I'm so sad and panicked about it! Any suggestions on how to get through it? This is my 1st baby and never expected it to be this hard to go back to work. Help!! :(

15 Comments

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Sara - posted on 02/03/2009

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I just came back to work 3 weeks ago. I'm not going to sugar coat it, I cried every day for the first week. But, it has gotten easier and honestly, my daughter seems to really enjoy daycare. I think the key is to focus on what you can control in the situation: You can't control the fact that you have to be a working mother, but you can control the quality of time you spend with your little one and the people he/she is with when he/she's not with you. You are doing this for them! And I worried that my daughter wouldn't be as attached to me or forget who I was (seems silly!), but we are just as bonded as we were before I went back to work. I do miss her, but I know the time we do get to spend together means something and is special. Good luck and hang in there, it'll be ok!

Amy - posted on 02/01/2009

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Thank you to all of you!!!! It makes a world of difference knowing that I'm not alone and that I'm not crazy for crying just thinking that I'm leaving my little guy. I know he will be great, he loves his sitter and I know that I will be too. Just wish I didn't have to work! But, unfortunately that isn't an option. Anyways, you all have been wonderful and supportive beyond belief! I'll let you all know how it goes tomorrow:)

Becky - posted on 02/01/2009

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Hi Amy,



I went back to work when my daughter Jessica was 6months old. I was fine when i dropped her off at the childminders, i pulled off her drive and didn't stop crying the whole way to work! I was late on my first day back because i had to keep stopping. It is not easy and i missed Jessica like crazy, the fact i hated my job and had not even planned on going back made it worse for me. I worked stupidly long days and felt i missed a lot with Jessica. The only thing i can say is i really really appreciated my time with her but also felt i got somethign from the adult conversations at work.



So when i came to going on maternity leave to have my son Oliver, i knew one thing for sure, when i had to return to work it would not be to the same job. My previous employers were not concerned about family just money making. I found a job with my local council who operate flexiable working patterns. My boss has had no problems letting me dash of when needed (like when my childminders sister-in-law died very suddenly) i was even able to do some of my work from home.



Just take smalls steps when you get back start with a big cuppa, catch up on the gossip, show off the photos of your little one. Get to the end of the day and when you pick your little one up and see that they are ok (although will have missed you) that makes it a little bit easier, or at least i did.



I also had spent time with the childminder i picked for Jessica before i wnet back to work and so i knew Jessica would not feel dumped. I have used the same Childminder for Oliver.



I hope this is of some help, but it is a really difficult thing to do as i am sure every mum that returns to work will tell you.



Good luck, pack some tissues and get to the end of the day



Becky x

Heather - posted on 02/01/2009

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I went back to work when my daughter was 12 weeks. I cried the whole first day, but by the second day I realized that I didn't have to guilt myself into feeling that I was abandoning her. When I came home, she forgave me and just wanted to play! Don't be too hard on yourself!

Cristy - posted on 02/01/2009

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I went back to work when my son was 6 weeks, and I found that having tons of pictures of him to look at when I started feeling sad really helped. Also, don't expect to be 100% the first few days. I felt like I was working through a fog, but trust me it gets better with time. Good Luck!

Lauren - posted on 02/01/2009

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I remembert that day as if it were yesterday.  My son is 1 year now.  I had taken 6 mos off from work and the thought of going back was terrible.  I hated to leave him.  So many feelings; guilt being the top of the list.  There is no easy way to get through it.  I cried days before, the day of and the whole ride to work..  When I got to work and people asked how my son was....I would cry.  I am fortunate that my mom watches my son; so I had peace of mind.  I still called 30 times that day.  Each day got a little easier; but I still hate to leave him.  I know this probably didn't help...but you are not alone.  I know those feelings you are having and they are miserable!  Good Luck to you!

Michele - posted on 01/31/2009

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I was home for five months and went back to work this past Jan 5th.  The best thing to keep in mind is that you can't do everything.  What is most important is the baby.  So when you get off work, go home and do not race around doing chores.  Spend time with him and let everything else go until he is in bed.  Good luck.

Tracey - posted on 01/31/2009

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Good luck.. I too will be going back to work after my 6 week with my first born.. I still have another 2 weeks but the time flew and is flying... I am trying not to think of yet so that I can enjoy the time I still have with her but it's hard-- take it day by day...

Cyane - posted on 01/31/2009

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I hated going back to work when my kids were born!! I have now been able to stay at home with them more and still make an income. Email me f you would like to learn more about how to spend more time with your family!! This direct service company is fabulous! CJewels4you@yahoo.com

Janelle - posted on 01/29/2009

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It is always hard to go back to work and I agree with Amanda that you just try and keep busy and then leave as soon as you can to get home to hang out with your baby.  I really enjoy working because I know my first job is being a mom.  It gets easier with time.  It is hard for everyone at first.  It is still hard for me to go back to work after taking a vacation with my son.  But after a few days i am back to the routine.  If you can put pictures on your computer or on your desk then you can look at your baby whenever you want.

Deanna - posted on 01/29/2009

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I am in the same boat as you....I am returning back to work on Monday as well...My daughter is my first child too...I have been told to bring alot of pictures...I am not looking forward to Monday at all

Richardsalena - posted on 01/29/2009

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I went back to work when my son was 8 weeks. I started taking him to daycare the week before. That way, my first day back to work, which was stressful enough, was not componded by the first day of leaving him with someone else. That makes it doubly hard.  You might also try going back just a few hours the first few days. Ease into it if you can.

Julie - posted on 01/28/2009

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I went back 2 work when my daughter was 4 & half mths, first few days were really hard being honest with u i cried all the way there when there i was busy so took mind of it, she is my first 2 but on serious note she is 8mths now and its alot easier. x

Amanda - posted on 01/28/2009

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I went back to work when my son was 6 weeks.  It was hard but it didn't take to long to readjust.  I found that I would just keep busy.  I would go straight home and spend time with him. 

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